i am lacking evolution. i am accepting failure and loss. i am learning patience and i am longing to begin my legacy. maybe another 3 or 4 years, then i will begin my real journey. the real trip starts then. up until that point my life is a quest with no end, a road trip to find reason and essentially myself. i'll be gathering and preparing myself ( Read more... )

i feel like i'm being left in the dust. acceptance is way too hard. i'm getting sick of biting my tongue and biding my time. this will be a teeth grinding year.

yeah i'm lost man.

me warrior, me fear no one. this will be a great july 4th, i'm quitting my job and going back to school for a semester.

i'm always hungover it seems. life isn't so bad, moving fast. great party at tek's last night, the cops came, it was a bonafide success.

i need to set a goal otherwise i will be forever miserable.

back to the shrink today. i'm nervous. i've been anxious and nervous about a lot, so i've been isolating myself, or at least trying to. it's all subliminal. i've been dreaming a lot lately about people from my past, i'm not sure how healthy that is, they're all good dreams, rest assured. i find myself obsessing over nothing good lately, nothing ( Read more... )

i worry myself. i don't know when i will snap, if i'll be able to sleep, if i'll be too giddy to keep a straight face and too depressed to get out of bed. sometimes i'm stuck wondering if anything i feel is real, is it simply momentary with no real foundation? in a way i wish i could just go back, this whole moving forward is a pain in the ass ( Read more... )

rock me rock me rock me sexy jesuuuus

fucking anxiety and grogginess