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So once upon a time, my friend Thomas wanted to go looking for used clothes with me. So I take my laptop with me, because I want to listen to something on it. So after about an hour of sifting through miscellaneous shit, we decide to make our purchases and leave.

Right as Thomas drives away, after dropping me off, I think to my self OH FUCK, I LEFT ( Read more... )

March 18 ( Read more... )

Thomas is on edge. And it makes sense, all things considered, so I’m holding nothing against him. But we still end up missing the road we’d been looking for, and drive for a solid 18 minutes, trying to find the right street ( Read more... )

I was sitting in my third period class. Marketing. Nothing happens in marketing. At most, on occasion we’re required to “dress for success”, which I suppose translates to “I don’t care enough to think of something challenging for you to do, and I have an extremely limited understanding of marketing, so if you come to school wearing a suit, I’ll ( Read more... )

A little girl on a PowerWheels rolls down the hill towards me ( Read more... )

For the past three years, consecutively, every winter I draw Valentines cards. This is a little odd, when you take into consideration that I never give out and have not, since elementary school, been given a single Valentines card ( Read more... )

Print out your favorites, cut em out, and give them to people you want to think you care about them.


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Principal: Alright, now if all of you could go back to your classes. And when you get back, could you try to enter unobtrusively. ... Do you all know what the word unobtrusively means?

Me: Kick down the door and jump in screaming?

Principal: No, Richard, don't kick down the door.

So I'd been walking around the library for a good 45 minutes before I looked down at my hands and noticed that I, in bright purple ink, had the words "Fuck Kids" scrawled across my knuckles.