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My boyfriend is flying to Amsterdam right now for a business trip and I’m drinking vodka and water, trying to tire myself out. My sleeping schedule is so messed up ( Read more... )

No winning.

“Should I kill myself, or have a cup of coffee ( Read more... )

( Read more... )

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Tonight I hung out with Brantley. I took him to Jacks, which is always my go to, comfort spot. We went once before and it was closed. Tonight, it was too loud and obnoxious. I am so awkward and so is he. We're a terrible match. He's so nervous. Clammy, cold hands. So intense. In a really good way. UGH.  Super intense. He is the smartest person I've ( Read more... )

I spent my only off day this week drinking coffee, looking at jobs I am not qualified enough for, recording a cover of a song I will never share and crying in the middle of a hot day, while taking breaks to sit on my porch, re-reading, "The History of Love ( Read more... )

I want to be alone forever ( Read more... )

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You call me. Text me. Text me. Call me. Text me. Text me at 5 AM. At 5:30 AM. Call me at 6. At 6:30. I ignore you until I see you, flesh and flesh. And remember now, I hate you more than I have ever hated anyone in this entire world. I hate you more than I hate rainy days without naps. I hate you more than a flat tire. I hate you for not allowing ( Read more... )

We slow danced in the living room. He kissed me a million times and told me I smelled the same. "I used to smell you, randomly. You were embedded in my clothes." I told him I needed to go slow. He has no idea what this past month has entailed and part of me doesn't want him to know. He thinks one day we're going to get married. He's way too eager ( Read more... )