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Day nine-thousand nine-hundred ninety-three.
After turning in some papers and dithering around at home, I played several incomplete songs on the guitar, watched an episode of planet earth and drove out to the humane society to walk some dogs. The weather is getting colder and we are running low on fuel. If history is any indicator, we will probably make it through another winter but our ( Read more... ) -
Discordance at Circle K.
Last night I was up late finishing some homework and running out of steam, so I walked down to Circle K to get a soda and a candy bar. I recognized the clerk; we exchanged greetings. I noticed the store was empty save us and he had a cigarette in his ear so I told him I was leaving and wasn't coming back in until he got a smoke break, for which ( Read more... ) -
Speech.
I'm taking a speech class in order to complete an associate's degree at the local community college. Every time I get up to speak in front of people, I try to remind myself to be present, that there's really no reason to be nervous, but somewhere along the walk up to the podium something happens and the next thing I remember I'm sitting back down ( Read more... ) -
Tip for people who wear glasses.
Even if your glasses are really dirty, don't take them off to look for your favorite eyeglass cleaning product. -
Fermi paradox.
1. People design weapons of mass destruction.
2. People start chattering about the dangers of these weapons.
3. People blow themselves up, causing their own extinction.
4. Extra-terrestrial people continue their search for intelligent life, wondering why no one responds to their SETI signals. -
Hats and glasses, in Oregon.
Scenario with no hat:
1. You park your car somewhere.
2. It rains.
3. Your glasses get wet and you can't see anything.
4. You can't find your car. -
Prescription glasses.
I got a new prescription for my glasses so now I can see better. In fact, I think they put something in these lenses to give me depth perception. I don't think I've ever had it before except when wearing those red and green glasses at the movies. Also, there was a special on glasses that get darker when in contact with direct sunlight so I got ( Read more... ) -
I am just borrowing your facilities.
The administrators closed the college on me today, almost disrupting my study plans. Fortunately, someone left a door unlocked and I found that door. -
Whoever broke into my car.
I have been advised not to curse you, as any evil I inflict on the world will come back to me three-fold. Still, we can't have you breaking into people's cars all the time. So, I hope that you find meaning in your life and don't have to break into people's cars anymore. Also, I am binding you to one year of community service, either in this life ( Read more... )
