Ten minutes in the rain and these clothes feel spent.
"Sir, I'm afraid it's The Rumpling. We'll make her as comfortable as possible, and wait."

The bathtub, unexpectedly, has something to offer in the way of triumph over dampness. Should there be no reprieve by Sunday, I will buy a snorkel and submerge; so there All wet! The kind, lonely man who ( Read more... )

Don't try to get me down, sister
I may be sick, but lord, I been sicker
An this Robitussin train gon take me home
Yes this Robitussin train gon take me home

These are my leftovers, but this isn't my fridge. Something atypical has gone on.

"What's this? It's a cat. There's a cat on my bed ( Read more... )

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I'd like to take a moment to pay respects for the lamentable reality that brought us here in the first place: the world offline cannot satisfy the appetites of our rapier-like wits, nor meet our wont to toast one another's rapier-like wit.

1.completely retarded.
2.heartwarming.

It's too soon to say what it is, but I will say that, to it's end, I have purchased a megaphone.

This is one of my favorite plotless stories ( Read more... )

This day is:
1.groundhog day.
2.the second anniversary of Willy Pwastika's residency in Montreal.
3.the first anniversary of the death of my wisdom teeth.I've been zealous about retrospection since Christmas. So wallow along, friends! One year ago today was the first day of the rest of your past year! This year is the new last year! The future of ( Read more... )

Every man woman and child should be entitled to an acre of clouds, every rose has its thorn, every boy should have a dog with a silver lining, every girl should have a unicorn pony and a mother who will let her have one, fish should have bicycles as long as they live on them and use them, and everybody needs a hobby.