An Irishman walks into a bar and orders three beers. He takes his beers to a table, and takes a sip from each mug in turn, until all three are empty. Then he proceeds to the bar and orders three more beers. The bartender looks irritated and explains that if he orders one beer at a time, they’ll be fresher and more enjoyable. “Well,” says the ( Read more... )

So, tell me more about my situation ( Read more... )

i love you cuz you love our kids ( Read more... )

so... it was too cold for me to walk to get beer last night so i decided on Jack and Cokes, whatta fucken mistake that was. my head feels as heavy as my Uzi, it weighs a ton. next time i'm either walking my cold, skinny ass to the store for beer or just sticking to Coke WITHOUT the Jack.

it's scary but i can drink now and actually get up in the morning with hardly any hangover whatsoever. the only problem now is the damned stinky living room from smoking to much.

Little Leroy went to his mother demanding a new bicycle. His mother decided ( Read more... )

1. I’ll respond with something random about you.
2. I’ll challenge you to try something.
3. I’ll pick a colour that I associate with you.
4. I’ll tell you something I like about you.
5. I’ll tell you my first/clearest memory of you.
6. I’ll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. I’ll ask you something I’ve always wanted to ask you.

1. i like smelling ( Read more... )

that's right, all you single, divorced, seperated, widowed, lonely shits!!  we got it going on, baby.
ugh, we are broke as fuck too. buuut happy as fuck to go with that poverty.
somewhere along the way i lost complete control of my finances, got get back on top or at least near it.
saw CRANK tonight, that movie kicked so much ass in so many ways!! it ( Read more... )

I knew this kid named Max
He used to get fat stacks out on the corner with drugs
He liked to hang out late at night
Liked to get shit faced and keep pace with thugs.
Until late one night there was a big gun fight
Max lost his head
He pulled out his chrome .45
Talked some shit
And wound up dead.
Now his wife and his kids are caught in the midst of all of his ( Read more... )

I've seen a rich man beg, I've seen a good man sin, 
I've seen a toughman cry.
I've seen a loser win and a sad man grin, 
I heard an honest man lie.
I've seen the good side of bad and the down side of up,
and everything between.
I licked the silver spoon, drank from the golden cup,
and smoked the finest green.
I Stroked the fattest dimes at least a couple ( Read more... )