It seems this has been my season to lose faith. I feel like everything is slowly slipping away from me-including my sanity. It’s not that I feel depressed or devastated by this experience. I actually feel like it’s happening for a reason. It’s the push that I need to find my path towards my passion. But that doesn’t mean that I’m not a little ( Read more... )

I just got back from watching the midnight showing of X2. It was so fuckin awesome! It definitely surpassed all my expectations (since I wasn't all that thrilled with the first one). This movie was very well integrated into the X-Men continuity. They changed some stuff but, basically, they did a really good job. This sequel was definitely in a ( Read more... )

Feelings of rejection and neglect slowly creep out of my mind once again ( Read more... )

Today has been moving along at a pretty brisk pace. THANK GOODNESS! Tomorrow, I have a shoot for a short spoken word movie in Brisbane. It's at 9 AM. I guess I can scratch sleeping in off my list of things to do. Knowing South SF, it's probably gonna be cloudy, cold, and windy too. But, hey, it'll be an important experience ( Read more... )

Just got back from lunch in the Employee Dining Room here at work. It's so depressing in there. Just a bunch of people who hate their jobs scurrying to the EDR to gorge on fattening food as quickly as possible so they can return to their dreadful jobs on time ( Read more... )

Once again fumbling towards confusion. This worn out path is eerily familiar. This path is easy. Tried and tested. It feels right even though it's most likely wrong. But now the cycle begins once again. No beginning, no end. Just a cycle. History banging on my back door. No one's there. It's just the wind.

I went on a date last Friday with this guy that seemed perfectly normal, nice and sincere. I thought it ended pretty well. He suggested we should do it again sometime. I said ok. He hasn't called me since then. I called him on Saturday and we spoke briefly. The conversation felt a bit cold. When we hung up, he said, "I'll call you." I was ( Read more... )

It's like the new-age Cassandra complex. The curse of foresight but the inability to do anything about it. I can see impending dooms and the destruction they bring. But my voice is weak and unheard--a halted breath in a gale or a whisper in a maelstrom. Or are those around me deaf ( Read more... )

It's my own fault really. For putting my faith into believing that everything will be okay. I set myself up for disappointment and I get it every time. An hour ago, I was going to be performing on the 26th with a friend of mine (singing backup). As of now, I'm not. Not enough time she says ( Read more... )

I feel uninspired ( Read more... )