I don't think I want to ever go to a party again. I was even sober at this one. I just saw something though that made me sick to my stomach. Like a gutshot in a boxing match followed by a knockout uppercut. Just insult to injury.

I keep letting my mind be consumed a little bit more each and every day by something, and I'm starting to like it. No matter how much music I listen to, my mind can't seem to absorb enough of the power it has over me. I seriously hope that when this is all over, I'll be a completely different person. Not that I feel the need to change myself, but ( Read more... )

i'm losing my mind. i dont know what the hell to do anymore. i dont know what i want to do, where i want to go, who i want to be, or how to get there. i dont want to do college anymore. i want to give up. i feel this overwhleming weight on my shoulders to be the first person in my family to make it through college, and i'm stuck between going ( Read more... )

Tonight was absolutely amazing. Big Head Todd is a great band to see if you ever get the chance. Not only did we get in free, we got in the front. We could actually touch the stage, and got to shake hands with the band. It was the longest setlist I'd ever seen. It was 25 songs, but it was terrific. Rusty and I met some cool people and got to enjoy ( Read more... )

I know no one needs me anymore, but I'm tired of being taken for granted. I feel lke if i disappeared for 2 weeks no one but my parents would notice. There's no one That keeps up with me, and if i try to talk to them, they just ignore me. Nobody answers their phones or messages. Today for instance, I left 5 different people messages and no one ( Read more... )

I've been having this urge to write. Nothing comes to mind though when I try. Life isn't the same anymore. That's all that can be said from these lips. Theres something obviously missing, but things are better. That doesn't negate that theres still a huge gap in my head. I want to go to sleep early tonight. I've been having crazy dreams. The kind ( Read more... )

I'm feeling better as of late. I feel like the weights on my shoulders disappeared overnight. I've been running around like a 6 year old in a candy shop. This is great. Like I'm a step ahead for once. After the two previous posts and getting over the insanity that had come over me, I feel new. I don't feel like Ross anymore. I feel like something ( Read more... )

The jig is up and I've figured out your game. There's not a damn thing you can do about it now.

I DONT FUCKING CARE ANYMORE

So this is the beginning of the end. Assuming things go according to plan that is. I march into college for one more semester, and then I transfer. I make my getaway finally. I'm scared. A little sick too. If you ask me if I know why I'm getting myself into, I'll tell you "No, but it's going to be bittersweet". I like to think I'm going to run ( Read more... )