Comments | sanityrules: The hardest part about being a parent

runswthsc1ssors in sanityrules

The hardest part about being a parent

Jan 11, 2004 22:46

I realized that I have been kind of, I don't know, rude? to Adam the last couple of days. I was on his case about not being home very much and then I started complaining about the stuff he should be doing and all that dumb junk parents yell at their kids about. And then it dawned on me. I wasn't really mad at him. He didn't really do anything ( Read more... )

Comments 9

legendaryecho January 12 2004, 07:21:49 UTC

That's exactly what my mother is doing at the moment. She praises my independence and allowing a trasitional phase of my working and hanging out with friends as preparation for when i leave, as well as my being happy this year and getting out and doing stuff, then completing rants about my not being home and spending time with her. So a couple days later when all is cooled down, i offer to see a movie with her, and she declines saying its my time to spend with friends...

I'm glad you understand. I assume all mother's are clingy, I can't imagine them not being, nor would I want them to not be. It is their child, after all, and it shows they care. It's just a matter of how much they pursue that and if they will take that step back..

I like hearing it from the parent side. It helps.

Another thought on parent/child relationships runswthsc1ssors January 12 2004, 17:24:53 UTC

This is such a difficult transition stage for parents/teens to go through. Everyone is charting new territory. As the child turns into an adult, the parent has to start learning to let go (which I'll tell you so far feels a lot like pulling off a band-aid, r-e-a-l-l-y s-l-o-w-l-y - ouch ( ... )

Re: Another thought on parent/child relationships legendaryecho January 13 2004, 04:31:08 UTC

thank you!!! ever so much.

... and Dads, too imgomez January 12 2004, 14:13:36 UTC

I agree with your description of the mixed emotions, pride and jealousy. Raising kids is like spending 16-17 years in the kitchen preparing the world's most amazing, scrumptious dish, and then, just when it's nearly perfect, you can't have any for yourself. I just want to point out that fathers experience the same thing. At least I do. And if our culture has crippled a lot of men so severely that they don't dare recognize their own sadness, let alone share it, that doesn't mean it's not there.

Re: ... and Dads, too runswthsc1ssors January 12 2004, 16:54:47 UTC

I like your kitchen analogy. It gave me a new way to look at the process. Like a chef back in the kitchen of a restaurant, who doesn't actually eat the food, he takes pride and enjoyment in offering it to the diners. In the same way, we offer our children to society at large, (and hope they don't get sent back because they're undercooked ;)

Mulvaney's? imgomez January 13 2004, 00:58:55 UTC

It's been referenced before, I guessed it was a teen hang out or something, but bleeding nipples?! WTF - are you going to SM clubs or what?

Re: Mulvaney's? runswthsc1ssors January 13 2004, 17:39:48 UTC

No. Mulvaney's is a (shhhhhh..... country bar). Sunday is family day. There is a big group of us that goes from 6-9:30 to dance. It is a riotously good time. We really work up a sweat as the dancing is nonstop. We give Matt a ride (which is quite funny as he is 6'5" and we crumple him up in a little ball and make him sit in the back seat of the Focus (with 6'2" Adam - good times). Matt sweated through two shirts and was regaling us with a description on the way home of how his nipples got so irritated he was sure they were bleeding.

Mulvaney's is the reason that Adam now has a hankering for a cowboy hat. :)

Thread 6