(no subject)
Character Name: Sarge
Series: Red vs. Blue
Age: Unknown, but sounds well into counselor age
Job: Drill Sergeant
Canon: Red vs. Blue follows the story of a war between two rival factions in the far future, locked in eternal combat for the greater good. A greater good that neither side is fully aware of, nor really cares about anyway. Instead, Red team and Blue team have boiled down their fight to ‘kill the other team and take their flag.’ With their bases only 500 yards away from each other and three men to each team you’d think they’d be done by now, but you’d be amazed by what laziness and incompetency can do to overall efficiency.
As the leader of the Red team, Sarge is a seasoned veteran with years of experience under his belt. He’s absolutely dedicated to the war and will stop at nothing to defeat the Blues. This generally results in a complete lack of care for his team’s welfare, frequent degradations, and occasionally turning one of them into a cyborg for maximum efficiency. While some people might call his radical ways overly eccentric and sociopathic, Sarge just likes to think of himself as being extra dedicated to the cause.
Sample Entry:
Listen up, dirtbags. The name’s Sarge. That’s Sergeant Sarge to you, Winky. Save the ass kissing for after introductions. I’ve been assigned here as your new Drill Sergeant, replacing your old sergeant who was tragically infected by a virus that turned him into a wiiiild zombie with a craving for succulent human flesh. And then accidentally shot by me. Fifteen times. And then twice more in the head just in case.
Command’s gotta be a lot quicker with those cultural differences memos. Would’ve killed the whole lot of you if it hadn’t been for Winky here nobly waving the red flag. But don’t get any bright ideas! I’ve still got my eyes on all of you and anyone showing any signs of unorthodox dietary changes will be promptly given a dose of shotgun-lead-to-the-face. That oughta help straighten out your unnatural cravings, you sick bastards.
But remember the past is the past! It’s time to move beyond our differences as alive and breathing and dead and decaying. Time to look forward to the new future where red zombies and humans alike will defeat the blue zombies in glorious undead combat! Now I have reports that most of you prefer the good old fashioned hand-to-hand combat. Or mouth-to-face. I like a good strangling myself every now and then, but I think we’ll be able to improve our overall efficiency and threat factor if everyone equips himself with this standard issue shot gun. No one will expect zombies to be wielding the very instrument of their own frequent demise! It’s brilliant!
Before we can get you meatbags equipped, you’re all going to have to undergo firearm training. While blindly shooting into the masses is an enjoyable activity, and one I frequently endorse, I want to be sure that you’ll be firing into the blue masses and not the red ones. This overly elaborate diagram I’ve prepared should help clearly depict who our common enemy is. Note all the dead blue-colored figures laying dismembered on the ground. That’s what we want the blue team to look like when we’re done with their sorry butts.
Enough with the fancy diagrams; it’s time for a field test! I’ve hidden ten blue targets out in that field and I want all of you to go out there, locate each of the targets, and rip them to shreds with the unique savagery that only individuals who have given into the mindless need to feed can produce.
Bonus points if you bring back the head!
Voting went here. (96.1%)
Series: Red vs. Blue
Age: Unknown, but sounds well into counselor age
Job: Drill Sergeant
Canon: Red vs. Blue follows the story of a war between two rival factions in the far future, locked in eternal combat for the greater good. A greater good that neither side is fully aware of, nor really cares about anyway. Instead, Red team and Blue team have boiled down their fight to ‘kill the other team and take their flag.’ With their bases only 500 yards away from each other and three men to each team you’d think they’d be done by now, but you’d be amazed by what laziness and incompetency can do to overall efficiency.
As the leader of the Red team, Sarge is a seasoned veteran with years of experience under his belt. He’s absolutely dedicated to the war and will stop at nothing to defeat the Blues. This generally results in a complete lack of care for his team’s welfare, frequent degradations, and occasionally turning one of them into a cyborg for maximum efficiency. While some people might call his radical ways overly eccentric and sociopathic, Sarge just likes to think of himself as being extra dedicated to the cause.
Sample Entry:
Listen up, dirtbags. The name’s Sarge. That’s Sergeant Sarge to you, Winky. Save the ass kissing for after introductions. I’ve been assigned here as your new Drill Sergeant, replacing your old sergeant who was tragically infected by a virus that turned him into a wiiiild zombie with a craving for succulent human flesh. And then accidentally shot by me. Fifteen times. And then twice more in the head just in case.
Command’s gotta be a lot quicker with those cultural differences memos. Would’ve killed the whole lot of you if it hadn’t been for Winky here nobly waving the red flag. But don’t get any bright ideas! I’ve still got my eyes on all of you and anyone showing any signs of unorthodox dietary changes will be promptly given a dose of shotgun-lead-to-the-face. That oughta help straighten out your unnatural cravings, you sick bastards.
But remember the past is the past! It’s time to move beyond our differences as alive and breathing and dead and decaying. Time to look forward to the new future where red zombies and humans alike will defeat the blue zombies in glorious undead combat! Now I have reports that most of you prefer the good old fashioned hand-to-hand combat. Or mouth-to-face. I like a good strangling myself every now and then, but I think we’ll be able to improve our overall efficiency and threat factor if everyone equips himself with this standard issue shot gun. No one will expect zombies to be wielding the very instrument of their own frequent demise! It’s brilliant!
Before we can get you meatbags equipped, you’re all going to have to undergo firearm training. While blindly shooting into the masses is an enjoyable activity, and one I frequently endorse, I want to be sure that you’ll be firing into the blue masses and not the red ones. This overly elaborate diagram I’ve prepared should help clearly depict who our common enemy is. Note all the dead blue-colored figures laying dismembered on the ground. That’s what we want the blue team to look like when we’re done with their sorry butts.
Enough with the fancy diagrams; it’s time for a field test! I’ve hidden ten blue targets out in that field and I want all of you to go out there, locate each of the targets, and rip them to shreds with the unique savagery that only individuals who have given into the mindless need to feed can produce.
Bonus points if you bring back the head!
Voting went here. (96.1%)