I don't feel like I'm here anymore. I'm not attatched to this world really. Things don't impress me. I feel DEpressed more than anything. Nothing anymore is "cool" to me, nothing at all amazes me. I realized this when the Biltmore house seemed minute and trivial. All the carvings that took years, all the smoothed marble and stained glass left ( Read more... )

Inside-out, upside-down ( Read more... )

I've been complaining so much lately for the past two weeks. It seems like it's all I'm ever doing. I think it's starting to waer a bit thin, I mean, I'm sitting here right now wishing I was skitzo so I wouldn't have to be with myself. It's gotten to that point. I'm trying to decide if I should just keep to myself in order to have some 'me' time so ( Read more... )

Things are so confusing. Things generally speaking, of course....Oh hell, it's not like anyone is going to read this anyway, no need for obscurity. So there's this guy...yea, that usually seems to start out most of my stories. Shea put is this way before, I think during my past relationship I got so emotionally detatched from "him" that now that it ( Read more... )

Here's the deal. I'm stupid. I'm so stupid I can't even calculate my own damn SAT score correctly. When I thought I had made around a 1600-something, I actually made a 1510....seriously this is not good. But OH! It gets better. The second time around, I make a 1470...even worse! So I fit into their stupid statistic of the "38% do worse on the SAT ( Read more... )

It's 10 30 right now. I should be in bed. But I can't sleep. I actually haven't been able to sleep at night since last Wednesday. Know why? Guys suck. Plain and simple. Well, they don't all the time suck. Nathan doesn't all the time suck. Only when he's cheating on me. Which in that case, sucks ( Read more... )

So I like this guy. Nahtan Welsey...he's pretty much awesome ( Read more... )

Tonight was....absolutely amazing! Fright Night at church...we had Fear Factor games and I have to shove lots of meshed up spagehetti mixed in with curious tasting (strawberry, I think) applsauce...needless to say it was mighty disgusting. ANYWHO, Ethan and Chris both came tonight which was absolutely awesome. Chris is the most amazing person ever ( Read more... )

• Talked to Chris aka mohawk kid a lot last night. He's pretty awesome. We downloaded theme songs together last night..stuff from old shows. Angry Beavers, Salutue Your Shorts, SUPER CHICKEN!, Popeye the Sailor Man....just some awesome junk.
• Church: was in the nursery the whole time. This little girl, bless her heart, she was crying her eyes ( Read more... )

Preface: This is not supposed to make me look high-maintenance or haughty. Some expectations which I hold for guys I date that I have never honestly followed before. I think I should start now.

1> Ya gots ta be a CHRISTIAN! Yes, por supuestro OF COURSE! Major biggie here. If you don't love my God, you can't love at all. He's important to me. And I ( Read more... )