I finally made it to a Denver Hearse Association (DHA) meet! Six Flags: Elitch Gardens sponsored this event to kick off their seasonal Fright Fest. The free tickets called my name, So I reved up King Louie, grabbed Phil, and headed down. Highlights included but were not limited to:
-Staying with Zachary Helm (
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Yesterday found me driving down the road in a large 1982 Ford F-350. I came upon a rather tricky section of the road. It was not normally a tricky section of the road, but today it was particularly tricky, mostly because of the large truck parked in the opposite lane. As I approached, what should I see coming toward me, in my lane, but another ford ( Read more... )

I rode my dads dirt bike up to a campfire and back tonight. I had 3 notable run-ins with the local wildlife ( Read more... )

Sometimes I stop and think about that Bono character.

I wonder what on earth it was that he was looking for.

I wonder if he still hasn't found it.

I wonder if he thought to check the drains.

Today I decided to accomplish a monumental task that has needed accomplishing for the past three weeks: I washed my dishes. After a half hour or so of scrubbing, I unearthed the glass at the bottom of the sink, resting comfortably in the drain. It had caugh most of the past three weeks of crust and filth and food sludge. It was gross. I ( Read more... )

Nothing brightens up a day like watching a fat kid run through sprinklers.

I was thinking about the Ninja Turtles a few minutes ago and got depressed. It was such a good idea! Ninja Turtles! What could possibly be awesomer than Ninja Turtles!? Then some boob got ahold of the idea and comletely botched it and made it as un-awesome as possible. Whoever that person is, I hope they pay ( Read more... )

In less than 24 hours, the stars will shine brighter. The sky will be bluer. Your left eyebrow will be bushier ( Read more... )

You remember the episode about a month ago in which Uncle Sam Angrily scrawled a letter at me demanding an extra $900 from me for his trouble ( Read more... )

You know those times when you find yourself lost on a trail of endless links, entangling yourself in the world wide web with no particular direction in mind? I did one of those today. One interesting looking fork in the road took me to cbp.gov, the border patrol page. The word "Careers" caught my eye ( Read more... )