there's this thing that i do that only my sisters have known me long enough to notice. or only they have looked closely enough. either way. this thing is stupid but i can't control it. it is somehow easy, or mechanical is a better word maybe, for me to just stop feeling a certain way inexplicably. like survival mode. if i am anticipating something ( Read more... )

i want more of you and feel like i have no right to ask for it.

here is my problem: i know the answer just not how to enact the course of action.

diets don't fail people, people fail diets.

veggies do not fill me up buttercup. i needwant some fucking bread.

here is a to do/buy list
-clean my room
-clean out my car, vacuumming and everything (still need to vaccuum)
-get a hair cut
-get a new make up bag becasue the zipper broke on mine-get some sugar scrub because bar soap ain't cuttin it ( Read more... )

kayla and i are starting diets tomorrow. well after the traditional breakfast with montana before she leaves. i'm honestly excited about this. and not because i'm fat and blah blah but because its healthy shit. and i spent $64 on it and i better fucking follow through or ELSE.

it feels like there is something huge around the corner. the "proverbial" corner, i guess. something coming and maybe it's not really bad but it is scaring the fuck out of me. in a very quiet way. just a very big hole through my entire rib cage.

change: the inevitable, the unsavory.

i don't really have anything to say. just kind of... killing time i guess ( Read more... )

learning to breathe underwater.

i genuinely enjoy living. i really do. even when i am going crazy.

lost at sea.

i am feeling this way for no reason.