Where fluttering thoughts keep me awake and provide a nostalgic comfort. I take a walk down memory lane, of past loves and past lives. Curiosity ignited, uneasy feelings stirred. I remind myself that I'm in the happiest relationship I've ever been in, and yet, on nights like these, I wonder what might have been. I blame human nature.

I blame this ( Read more... )

Would it be best to have the greatest love that brought you the greatest joy, but also the greatest pain? Or would it be better to have a great (not the greatest) love that brought you great (not the greatest) joy, and only great (not the greatest) pain?

Mind over matter. It appears that I can rationalize you out of my heart.

Is it better to be hurt inadvertently through willful carelessness or purposely with malicious intent?

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.

And what if Mr. Nice Guy isn't as nice as she thought? What if he's the worst kind of "nice guy" - the kind that's actually a jerk on the very inside? They're tricky; they wear their masquerades well.

And what if she never musters the guts to say aloud these fictional conversations that she rehearses over and over in her head? What if she becomes a ( Read more... )

she thinks maybe it's regret ( Read more... )

these bubbles of joy are dizzying
this is a different sort of happiness than she has felt before
it stretches to the tips of her fingers and toes
and lingers even after the warmth of his skin has cooled on hers

As she rides the train home, a tingling anticipation overcomes her. She yearns to see her parents, her brother, her dog, her bed. She has been away for far too long ( Read more... )

I wish I knew.

What, you may ask?

That's the problem.

Even I don't know.

I wish I had answers.

I wish I knew the questions.

I feel stale.

Slowly digging my rut.

My grave?

I'm tired.

Tomorrow is another day.

... her convictions from the night before ring empty. She wonders how long she can keep fooling herself. Trying to convince herself that she's happy, when it's obvious that the painful opposite is true. She wonders how her resolve can crumble so easily, like fragile ice. She wishes her will power were stronger; that she had what it took to follow ( Read more... )

She feels cold, like she is slowly freezing over. She assumes it is due to the frigid winter temperature. She emits a soft gasp as a dreadful realization overcomes her. The coldness is radiating from her chilly core. The numbness in her soul seeps into her veins until she is wholly frozen ( Read more... )