even after all these years, you still linger on my mind. i truly believe you were the closest thing i had to a first love and i didn't realize it then. the sadness has waned as the years have passed, but it doesn't mean i don't think of you.

sometimes i wish we could start over.
sometimes i wish i wasn't so stubborn.
and sometimes, i wish i didn't act ( Read more... )

 i get it. you don't want anything to do with me because i hurt you.
that's fine.

however, don't go out of your way to make it perfectly clear that you think i'm diseased at work and then when you get some liquid courage in you think its okay to talk and act like i exist. THAT pisses me off. i can accept if you're avoiding me and to be perfectly ( Read more... )

being independent is a great thing ( Read more... )

i'm trying as hard as i can to keep from sabotaging myself because that's all i seem to do when it comes to guys. this one seems to really wanna get to know me and i'd like to know him better but i cannot seem to get that voice from in my head to shut off. the constant thought of rejection and it just not working out in the end are terrifying to me ( Read more... )

I wonder if anyone even checks/reads this thing anymore ( Read more... )

never will i ever have children. mark my words.

all that needs to be said for today as far as working with them goes is that they make me clench my jaw to the point that i give myself a headache along with multiple back spasms. awesome. and my bosses are useless.  thanks for nothing.

moving on... i'm about a third of the way through with my training ( Read more... )

for the first time in forever, depending on your perspective, i'm up late/early enough to hear the birds chirp their first song of the day.  things have been really chaotic lately, but today went exceptionally well.  i think it helped that i read something and it just made me feel better instantly because of what the message had to say.  work was ( Read more... )

the thought of you causes heat to course through my body and stains my cheeks red.  i out myself without even meaning to ( Read more... )

of all the valuable things i've learned in the last five years, this one thing is one of the more important:

you can only take words spoken/written at face value. it's the actions that will truly prove where they stand.

just finished having one of the most random/awkward/ridiculous conversations with a former classmate.  i don't get it. now i'm not looking for a relationship by any means whatsoever, i'm more than happy to just have a make-out buddy, in all seriousness. for whatever reason though, i attract the worst kinds of boys, lately all of which have ( Read more... )