So, I still think I'm pregnant. No womanly wonders since over six weeks ago. My back hurts so bad today. I worked 8 hours in a pair of new shoes.

Dorian and Stephanie came into the beanery friday night. I freaked out and went home.

Today I started Old Navy. Uniforms piss me off. Work lasted waaaay tooo lonnng.

Boys and guitars make me wanna kill someone.

More wine?
Yes, please.
Just for me?

Soon you'll see.
Bottle #2- I'm through.

Cat shitty days: hooray!

So much changes everyday, and one day can change a lifetime so easily. I can't remember what I wrote to you about last, but life so stands now to bring me the realization Justin is a joke. I word that harshly as my pain grows thinking over this. I feel naieve and gullible for trusting someone who caused so much unresolved pain in my life ( Read more... )

Justin and I have been arguing every single night right as he goes to leave. I think we made a baby. I feel like hell because I miss Stan so much. I allmost called him after Justin left a few minutes ago, but I can't do that. "more than words" is stuck in my head ( Read more... )

I just woke up freezing on the sofa in my apartment from a dream about a serial killer played by Dustin Hoffman. It was another one of those dreams that when I am in them, I think I am trapped in a movie. I know it isn't real even while I'm dreaming it, but I can't get out ( Read more... )

I haven't wrote in a while which is very depressing to me because so much keeps happening so very quickly.

I woke up on Thursday and went to a job interview at Old Navy. It was another group interview. I kinda flipped out that night. I drank 6 Zimas and locked myself in the bathroom. Justin and I were fighting again. He went home with me feeling ( Read more... )

I just got back from seeing Drew Barrymore's new movie. Erica, Chuck and I went. It was very upsetting. I miss stan a lot right now. I can't help but relate the movie in part to him though. His drinking scares me so much sometimes. Yet I love him. He's so good to me, yet he can be the most horrible thing that ever happened to me. I'm so confused ( Read more... )

I worked at the Coffee Beanery today for seven hours. Most of which I thought of Justin. I told work Heather the story of us getting together and she smiled and giggled manicly in her own annoying way. She said "Wow, that's wonderful" so I had to stop for a minute and think - maybe this is wonderful. What does wonderful feel like? Is this it ( Read more... )

I took the which friend are you test on Emode.com, and scored Rach.

So, yesterday I applied to Bananna Republic & Calvin Klein. I really need a 2nd job. My rent was due today. Goodbye money ( Read more... )