is it worth waking up if the only thought in your head until it hits the pillow is of going to sleep and hoping you don't wake up? i feel fucking terrible. someone put a gun in my mouth cause i love the taste of metal.
am bored and cold. have spent the day avoiding writing an essay on Freud. listened to Big Black instead. am considering setting myself on fire for fun like in the song Kerosene. would prefer if Tom was here so i could set him on fire too. then we could burn and have sex.
i saw a movie called Gemini. it was fucking weird. if youre into japanese movies you should see it. its directed by the same guy that directed tetsuo: iron man but its pretty different. the camera work is amazing and the plot is pretty weird and nuts but essentially really simple.