Well!!!! It has been awhile since my last post. Alot of good things have happened since then too. First of all I am getting better. I feel better anyway. I thank my meds for that. Secondly, two people very close to me are no longer fighting. I think that has also helped me. I don't have to feel all the tension when they are together. Next thing is ( Read more... )

Well, here I am again! I have been working on getting better. Everyone has supported me in my efforts. I do feel like I am getting better. I have run into a slight problem though. I am so torn up about it. I have been put in the middle of two people I care about. This gets very complicated. It is something I can't explain, (well I could, but that ( Read more... )

Wow! I have a stranger sleeping on my couch! A friend brought him over a few days ago because he got kicked out of his house. Well he showed up over here last night looking for my friend and he wasn't here. I tried calling him and he ingored my calls. I left a message and got no reply. Why do I let people take advantage of me? This kid is not my ( Read more... )

As hard as I try I can't shake the feeling of hopelessness. I feel so alone and I am very tired of feeling alone. My daughter ingores me most of the time. I am not "fun" to be around anymore so my friends don't come around either. My sisters come around out of loyalty. Guys come around to "get some". I would love to have someone for myself. Someone ( Read more... )

I said in my last entry that I am trying to start my life over, well that is so hard to do. I am going to group 5 days a week and it seems to help, but when I leave there, I have to deal with all the bullshit of everyday life. Some days there is buckets full of bullshit, others not so much. I had such a great day yesterday and then today nothing ( Read more... )

I have deleted all previous entries. I want to start all over with this journal and my life. I have been depressed latly and was put into the hospital for a few days. I got out today and I start my counseling tomomow morning. I am very nervous about it. I really want to get better and not be so upset and angry all the time. The littlest things set ( Read more... )