the thing about depression is, it's not easy for those who haven't experienced it to understand it ( Read more... )

elliot smith lyric for the subject line ( Read more... )

So, on top of the depression, the upset of the uncertainty of things related to the guy, the existential crisis...I also have no money ( Read more... )

I spent most of today angry ( Read more... )

It's come to my attention tonight that, when bored, I can become incredibly destructive. Self-destructive, even. I just get into trouble. I make trouble. I want entertainment, I want something to do, I want something to play with, so I court trouble ( Read more... )

I do my best sometimes to not really own how I feel, particularly if it makes life difficult for me. I will hide, run away, burn it down, do whatever I have to do to not own it. Why? Because to sit and be with that feeling can be overwhelming ( Read more... )

things are just...not how i hoped they'd be. or thought they'd be. or maybe they are? i don't even know ( Read more... )

If I could fall asleep for 20 years, like Rip Van Winkle, I might opt to do it ( Read more... )

hrm. not really sure what is going on ( Read more... )

Sometimes, I wonder why I care so much about this situation. When I am focused on something else, it's not a big deal. I catch myself thinking, "Why do I care about this person?" I beat myself up a lot. I'm pretty cruel to myself sometimes. I also do my best to tear apart how I feel, to make it less, as a means of protecting myself. I hear ( Read more... )