I hate pooping at work. Thankfully there are like 8 restrooms. I just keep going into different ones until I find one that is completely empty. Sometimes people come in while I'm pooping. I have to stop in mid-poop and wait until they're gone. Also, my hemorrhoid have cleared up.

So, today I was taking my morning poop. It was nice. It was enjoyable. It was relaxing. It was normal colored for a change. And a floater. The perfect poop in other words. I haven't had a poop that good in weeks. It was a nice surprise from the beer poops I had been expecting. So right in the middle of this glorius poop comes a knocking on my door ( Read more... )

I've received hundreds of thousands of e-mails from people concerned that I haven't posted recently. Many of them thought that I hadn't pooed in many days. Don't worry folks, I've been pooing like a machine ( Read more... )

All jokes about green things aside, today was the greenest poo I've ever had. No joke. It was seriously the color of dried lawn clippings. Don't know what I am eating to give it that color but it's seriously gross.

My first poo was about noonish, when I got up. It was a ghost poop. By that I mean I pooed, but when I looked in the bowl nothing was there. It was disgruntling. I was really looking forward to a good morning dump. There were a couple rabbit bits though, and they floated ( Read more... )

Before this poop it had been days, and boy did it show. This poop was huge. It was easily the size of a small nation. And very multi-cultural too. There was a lot of corn at the top and some nuts at the bottom. Very interesting.

So after eating at Cici's I thought I had a poop coming on. When I got home it just wouldn't come. It was very upsetting. I was looking forward to a nice bowel movement but nothing. Hopefully this is a temporary condition and I can inform all you dear readers about my latest poop soon.

I had to work all day yesterday so this was absolutely a work poop. I don't usually like pooing at work but I enjoy getting paid to poo. I mostly don't like pooing at work becaue of the toliet paper. It's "John Wayne" tp, meaning it's rough, it's tough and it don't take no shit off nobody. And believe me I needed lots of tp for this poo. It was ( Read more... )

I guess you could call this a work poop. I was at home but on the clock, so I was getting paid to poop. I guess that makes it a work poop. Fairly uneventful. Not particularly stinky. Not like my other high fiber poops either in that it was nice and soft. Not too tough, not too soft. A nice middle ground of poop. Saddly, no floaters.

Before running off to work a wicked poop hit me. Thankfully it wasn't one of those train wreck style fecale explosions that happen on the way back from Mardi Gras. It was a fairly decent poo. Quite a bit of material. Dark brown in color. Fairly long turds but a few rabbit pieces. One long one and all the rabbits floated. Unfortunately, I had to ( Read more... )