Once Again
Title: Once Again [Short Story]
Pairing: Onew / Key
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst, Romance
Summary: Are you sure you made the right decision?
Disclaimer: This is the sequel to Forgive Me for Lying. I don’t own anything other than the ending - this one-shot - since the storyline is taken from the song itself. I wrote it just because I want to. Enjoy.
A/N: I hope you readers enjoy it. Comments and criticism welcome. I appreciate your help. This is solely based on Iklim - Bukan Aku Tak Cinta because I got addicted to that song. I couldn’t find translations to the song so I did them myself. You can check it out here.
Also, I made Jonghyun smart and not himself in this as I wanted to portray him according to the books he reads - I’m not sure if you understand what I mean…
I know my author’s note is getting a little long but I realised that my dialogues are starting to look like those in mumuja darling’s fic so thank you for them! You’ve really influenced me and I mean in a good way!
Forgive Me for Lying
Onew looked across his room to the huge box on his desk. It was filled to the brim with letters from his Kibum. ‘No, Kibum isn’t mine to have and hold. He isn’t mine to love,’ Onew thought to himself as stray tears escaped.
The younger had started off sending emails to Onew but Onew had ignored them. When that had failed, Key had resorted to sending Onew snail mail, hoping he wouldn’t ignore those either but no such luck. Even Key’s calls and texts had been evaded.
Key slammed the textbooks that he had been carrying home from school onto his study table. ‘I should have expected something was wrong when Jinki gave me the address of his personal post office box instead of his real address. That way, I wouldn’t be able to find him,” Key complained to his slightly older brother, Jonghyun.
Key gasped as something came to his mind. “Oh my God, do you think he’s avoiding me because he found someone else there?! Is that the reason why he’s ignoring me? He doesn’t even bother to pick up my calls anymore! Neither does he reply my texts! Even if he does pick up or reply, he always says that he’s really busy rushing something. What if he decides he’s straight and leaves me? Oh gosh, what if I’m going to lose my boyfriend, Jjong?! I can’t live without him!” Key exclaimed as tears spilt over and ran down his cheeks.
Jonghyun slightly panicked at Key’s tears and promptly hugged the crying boy. He hated that he didn’t have the disposition to comfort anyone even when he wanted to. “Come on, Kibum. You know how much Jinki-hyung loves you. All of us know that. It has come to the point that I wish my boyfriend would treat me the same way Jinki-hyung does to you. All Minho ever does is play his sports; it’s so freaking annoying,” Jonghyun said, earning a small chuckle from Key.
“You know, despite you constantly saying that you suck at cheering up, you sure do a good job with me, Jjong,” Key said in between laughs but suddenly got serious. “It doesn’t change the fact that Jinki is avoiding me, you know,” Key whispered. “I’m scared to find out if he doesn’t love me anymore. What do I do if that happens?” Key continued, still crying as the brothers held on to each other, Jonghyun mentally swearing that he would find Onew for Key no matter the obstacles.
Three days later, the brothers received an invitation. “Jjong, it’s a wedding invitation for us! I wonder who would be getting married.” Key said excitedly as he opened the envelope.
Jonghyun had a gut feeling that Key wouldn’t like what he might see but before he could manage to stop Key from reading it, he heard a gasp and the invitation fluttered to the floor. Sobbing, Key ran up the stairs into his room, slamming the door behind him. Picking up the card, Jonghyun was only slightly shocked to read that Onew was planning to get married in three weeks. He was pretty sure that there was another reason Onew was doing this. However, he now knew that he couldn’t continue to take his time looking for Onew. Jonghyun quickly made a call and uttered a few curt words before he climbed the stairs to Key’s room to comfort his brother.
A couple of days later, Jonghyun had gotten all the information he wanted. He immediately got on his private plane to confront Onew. He had a show to put on.
Onew was not having a good day. He had woken up with an uneasy feeling but had gotten ready for class despite everything. It was Thursday, his longest day of the week for that term. He had to drag himself from one class to another, hating the fact that he never missed a class and never wanted to miss any in the future.
When he finally managed to get to go home after the numerous classes and project meetings after that, he was exhausted. However, when he stepped into his apartment, his guard immediately went up, causing him to look around nervously.
He noticed a figure sitting alone on his couch but before he could do anything, he heard Jonghyun’s voice as the table lamp on his side table came on. “How could you hurt him?” Jonghyun menacingly called out to Onew as he turned around to face the older guy. “He was already so upset that you didn’t reply him and now, you hurt him even more?! I don’t understand this, hyung. Did the two years together mean nothing to you? Do you have any idea how much you mean to Kibum? You know, if you didn’t love my brother, you didn’t have to string him along in the first place!” Jonghyun growled as the sound of Onew’s sobs filled the room.
“Why are you crying now? The damage is already done! Kibum had been constantly crying his eyes out, all worried that you’d found someone new, someone better than him and that you were too busy with your new whoever that you couldn’t even make time for him!” Jonghyun continued as Onew’s face paled. “You just had to prove him right, didn’t you?! Frankly, I had been looking for you to tell you to make time for Kibum but that was before we received the invitation. I have no idea why I’m here now. I will simply leave so just forget I ever came here. I wish you all the best for your marriage. Goodbye, Jinki-hyung.”
Jonghyun walked past Onew when he heard the elder whisper something. He twirled on his heels as he grabbed Onew by the shoulders. “What did you say? Are you for real? Dad asked that of you?” Jonghyun exclaimed; Onew nodding in reply as tears continued to fall from his eyes. “Why didn’t you tell us? You’ve made Kibum so worried and upset! Come, sit down and tell me everything,” Jonghyun ordered Onew as he pulled the other into a chair and sat across him.
‘I’m done crying! I’m going to get over him if it’s the last thing I do!’ he thought to himself, seething angrily.
The next day, Jonghyun got a call from his housekeeper, saying that Kibum was currently throwing a huge tantrum and smashing everything in sight, especially the presents from his boyfriend. As Onew sat across his dining table, listening to the conversation that was on speakerphone, he was upset and immediately blamed himself for hurting the one he loved.
“I hate myself, Jjong. I don’t deserve someone like Kibum. I can’t follow you back. Kibum doesn’t need to see me plus he hates me now,” Onew said after Jonghyun hung up. Onew’s tears were freely rolling down his cheeks as he silently got up and headed to his room but Jonghyun caught his arm and stood up, getting right into Onew’s face. “What…?” Onew started but was brutally cut off.
“Seriously, Lee Jinki… Why are you being such a pussy?! There’s someone over in Korea that needs you right now and all you can think about is about yourself and how much you feel guilty about this situation? Why don’t you do something about it instead?
Kibum is upset; you have no fucking idea how much he misses you for the whole year you’ve been here doing God-knows-what! If he rants at you, obviously it’s because you deserve it! You could have told Kibum the reason you had to leave! He would’ve understood and found a way out but no! You had to do it the hard way and hurt him. If anything, you should go back so that Kibum has a chance to get back at you for hurting him in the first place!” Jonghyun growled. Still crying quietly, Onew simply nodded as the both of them went to pack some items for the trip.
Upon reaching the Kim household, the housekeeper came forward to Jonghyun. “Kibum-sshi has been breaking more things after breakfast. I’m not sure if it’s still presents from Onew-sshi that he is throwing around anymore,” she said with a slight nod to Onew. She actually liked Onew since he had made Key more tolerable to work for and even if it was selfish of her, she hoped that they could get back together, for Key’s happiness as well as her own.
With that as a warning to Key’s current mood, they headed upstairs where the smashing was more audible. It was coming from inside Key’s room. As they stood in the hallway, Onew piped up as he shuddered, “I don’t think I have the guts to go in there, Jjong.”
Jonghyun sighed; he had his work cut out because this couple would be the death of him. Patting Onew on his back, he said, “Don’t throw away something you love just because someone wants you to. Go and get him back. Hwaiting!” and pushed Onew slightly in the direction of the closed door.
Onew froze, taking a deep breath and gathering his courage before knocking on the door. The reply came back in the form of a loud thud against the door and a shouted “Get lost! I said I don’t want to be disturbed!” which caused Onew to cringe. He would have bolted off if it wasn’t for Jonghyun.
At the other’s insistent urging, Onew opened the door and thanks to Key’s fast reflexes, immediately caught an alarm clock on his forehead, doubling over and groaning as he did so. Quick as a flash, Key was on him and fawning over him, apologising profusely before he realised that the guy underneath him was Onew.
“You’re such a bastard, why did you come back?! You always keep hurting me! I don’t even know why I love you anymore! All you ever do is constantly hurt me! I hate you, Lee Jinki!” Key screamed in Onew’s face, tears cascading down his face before he abruptly got up and stomped off, not noticing the tears that fell from Onew’s wide eyes, shocked and hurt by Key’s words.
However, Key didn’t get far. Jonghyun came forward and grabbed his younger brother from behind, exasperatingly pulling him and Onew whom had just stood up, making them stumble. He harshly dragged them to his room and slipped out, locking them inside together as they heard him chuckle to himself.
Key, already furious from before, yelled out, “Fuck you, Kim Jonghyun! I’m going to make sure Dad will tear down your bloody door! You will regret using the special lock against your own brother!” The two brothers had special electronic locks installed inside and outside the room that only unlocked the door when their password was typed in so as to prevent break-ins from affecting their room. Jonghyun had made use of the fact that Key didn’t know his latest password to lock his brother in his room, causing Key to get angrier that he already was.
As Onew looked on, it occurred to him that everything Mr Kim had said to him during the second meeting was true. Key and Onew would always be worlds apart and he needed to understand that. He had harboured a hope that in time, their relationship would finally be blessed but now, even he agreed that they were not meant to be.
He could never be able to make Key happy. Key loved being spoilt but if they stayed together, he would never be able to buy anything Key wanted. He wouldn’t be able to lavish Key with presents, especially since Key loved expensive branded items. He was not like Minho who was rich like them. It had never been about gay love; it was about status. Onew can never fit in because he had no money to his name and he had to constantly keep that in mind.
As Onew sat there contemplating his life, he slowly realised that the room had gone quiet and Key was nowhere to be seen. Panicking, Onew stood up and ran around the room, looking for Key only to find him crying on the cold floor of Jonghyun’s bathroom. He slowly walked up to Key, calling out softly, “Kibum - Key, are you alright? The bathroom’s cold. Why don’t you…?”
Before Onew managed to finish what he wanted to say, Key cut in, “I’m fine, Onew-hyung. I understand that you would rather be anywhere but here and that you’d rather not talk to me. I apologise on Jonghyun’s behalf for locking you in with me when you’d probably have better things to do. I will not disturb you since you look like you rather not have me around anyway. I’m sorry.”
Onew inhaled a sharp breath, absolutely hating the fact that Key was trying to be strong for him. He had always been the one for Key when the younger needed a listening ear or a shoulder to cry on. Onew was the one that was strong for Key and it was all so fucked-up that he had to fend for himself; looking like the red-nosed reindeer for which he could never remember its name.
“Key… Kibum, I… I still love you,” Onew said, mentally smacking his self the moment the words tumbling from his mouth for he could see the hurt clouding over Key’s features the moment he said it. Shaking his hands as if to deny his words, he tried to come closer to explain what he meant but ended up slipping on a rug and falling onto Key, causing the younger to squeak in surprise.
Onew’s head was on Key’s chest when he looked up into the other’s eyes which were wet with tears. There was fear portrayed in Key’s eyes as he stared at Onew, his lips quivering. “Hyung, I know you don’t care but I’m begging you, please don’t lead me on anymore. There’s only so much I can take. I’m just asking for one thing… Stop hurting me already,” Key pleaded softly as his moist eyes got bigger and wetter, fat tears sliding down his cheeks even as he tried to keep it in.
Without waiting for any reaction from Onew, Key pushed him off and ran out of the bathroom but Onew chased after him and tackled him onto the bed, pinning Key underneath him. Even though Key tried to struggle away, Onew managed to keep him in place, earning a shriek of frustration from the younger boy.
“Kibum, I need you to listen to me. Stop struggling! Just listen and I won’t disturb you again,” Onew implored to Key. Managing a glare as well as a pout while looking extremely adorable doing so, Key nodded so Onew continued, “Mr Kim asked me to leave you because I’m not rich. He bought me off and I allowed it! He said that he’d make you hate me if I didn’t listen to him… And I didn’t want that to happen to us.”
“You mean, my father?” Key asked and the other nodded.
Onew continued, “Kibum, I’m sorry that I hurt you but I had to do it. In fact, I wanted to do it because really, how can I make you happy if you stay with me? I can’t shower you with gifts the way you’d want me to. I can’t spoil you with everything you want. I can’t keep up your lifestyle even if I worked three jobs. I want you to be happy and I know that happiness for you would not be from me.
I have nothing to give except myself and I love you too much to let you settle for anything other than the best. I love you with all my heart Kim Kibum… But I can’t ever call you mine,” Onew said with a hint of sadness. Silently, he hugged Key and got off from the bed before curling up in a corner, sniffling as he tried to hold in his tears.
A moment later, a shaky voice reached his ears. “You… You didn’t need to do this. I could have…”
“No, Kibum. If you stay with me, he’ll disown you… And I can’t let that happen,” Onew interjected and the room fell silent again.
Meanwhile, Jonghyun was pacing outside. After Key had screamed at him, there wasn’t a sound coming from the room which could only mean that they were ignoring each other. Jonghyun knew that Key always screamed when he was in an argument and silence would simply mean the opposite, right? Sighing and shaking his head, he thought, ‘I’m always stuck doing everything here,’ as he walked up to his bedroom door and pressing his password.
Stepping inside, he noticed two pairs of red puffy eyes staring at him, one on the bed and the other in the opposite corner of his room. Sighing again, Jonghyun addressed Key, “So you know the whole story now?” who nodded, looking absolutely crestfallen. “Oh God, why are you so meek now? Since you really love Jinki-hyung, why don’t you go up to Dad and explain things to him? Fight for your relationship, God-damn-it!
Did you think I didn’t have this happening to me? Frankly, you guys have it easy! Money can be earned! Did you know how difficult it was for me to make Dad accept Minho as my boyfriend?” Here, Jonghyun paused to catch his breath, having said the whole thing in two breaths.
Suddenly, he heard a chuckle coming from his bed right before a ball of Key slammed into him. Jonghyun barely managed to hold on to Key to stop him from falling. “You are so right, Jjong! I really didn’t think about it! Thank you so much! I love you, Jonghyunnie!” Key giggled out, his eyes in perfect moon shapes because he was grinning from ear to ear.
“Hey, I already have Minho. Yours is over there,” Jonghyun nodded to Onew whom had stood up and was walking towards them, a slight smile on his face. Jonghyun quickly untangled Key’s legs from around his body and handed him over the Onew who looked extremely ecstatic to be holding Key in his arms once more.
Of course, Mr Kim was livid when he saw Onew with Key when he came back from work but Key had dragged him to the study before he had even managed to get a word out. Onew had gotten increasingly nervous as the hours ticked by and he didn’t want his boyfriend to handle anymore of his father’s harsh words.
Onew had sat in the entertainment room with Jonghyun, fretting while the younger had tried, to little avail, to calm him down. When Key and Mr Kim had returned a long moment later, he had a begrudging look on his face but his words were sincere. “Onew, apparently Kibum really loves you and he said that you make him really happy. I’d allow you to be with him on the conditions that you take care of him well. As well as the other thing I mentioned… It still stands.”
“What do you mean? You didn’t mention anything about this, Dad!” Key interrupted.
“Relax Kibum. Mr Kim wanted me to be a man of status before he would consider our relationship together,” Onew explained. Seeing that Kibum was about to retort, he continued, “And no, I’m not saying this just to protect your father from you.” Turning to Mr Kim, he continued, “I will try my best to do as you say and also treat Kibum well,” and bowed, earning one from Mr Kim as a non-verbal agreement.
Pouting, Key acquiesced. “Fine then… And thank you Dad,” Key said as he hugged his father. Smiling, Mr Kim simply ruffled his youngest son’s hair before he stepped out of the room. Looking back to his boyfriend, Key walked into Onew’s embrace, happy to be in his arms once again.
Pairing: Onew / Key
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst, Romance
Summary: Are you sure you made the right decision?
Disclaimer: This is the sequel to Forgive Me for Lying. I don’t own anything other than the ending - this one-shot - since the storyline is taken from the song itself. I wrote it just because I want to. Enjoy.
A/N: I hope you readers enjoy it. Comments and criticism welcome. I appreciate your help. This is solely based on Iklim - Bukan Aku Tak Cinta because I got addicted to that song. I couldn’t find translations to the song so I did them myself. You can check it out here.
Also, I made Jonghyun smart and not himself in this as I wanted to portray him according to the books he reads - I’m not sure if you understand what I mean…
I know my author’s note is getting a little long but I realised that my dialogues are starting to look like those in mumuja darling’s fic so thank you for them! You’ve really influenced me and I mean in a good way!
Forgive Me for Lying
Onew looked across his room to the huge box on his desk. It was filled to the brim with letters from his Kibum. ‘No, Kibum isn’t mine to have and hold. He isn’t mine to love,’ Onew thought to himself as stray tears escaped.
The younger had started off sending emails to Onew but Onew had ignored them. When that had failed, Key had resorted to sending Onew snail mail, hoping he wouldn’t ignore those either but no such luck. Even Key’s calls and texts had been evaded.
Key slammed the textbooks that he had been carrying home from school onto his study table. ‘I should have expected something was wrong when Jinki gave me the address of his personal post office box instead of his real address. That way, I wouldn’t be able to find him,” Key complained to his slightly older brother, Jonghyun.
Key gasped as something came to his mind. “Oh my God, do you think he’s avoiding me because he found someone else there?! Is that the reason why he’s ignoring me? He doesn’t even bother to pick up my calls anymore! Neither does he reply my texts! Even if he does pick up or reply, he always says that he’s really busy rushing something. What if he decides he’s straight and leaves me? Oh gosh, what if I’m going to lose my boyfriend, Jjong?! I can’t live without him!” Key exclaimed as tears spilt over and ran down his cheeks.
Jonghyun slightly panicked at Key’s tears and promptly hugged the crying boy. He hated that he didn’t have the disposition to comfort anyone even when he wanted to. “Come on, Kibum. You know how much Jinki-hyung loves you. All of us know that. It has come to the point that I wish my boyfriend would treat me the same way Jinki-hyung does to you. All Minho ever does is play his sports; it’s so freaking annoying,” Jonghyun said, earning a small chuckle from Key.
“You know, despite you constantly saying that you suck at cheering up, you sure do a good job with me, Jjong,” Key said in between laughs but suddenly got serious. “It doesn’t change the fact that Jinki is avoiding me, you know,” Key whispered. “I’m scared to find out if he doesn’t love me anymore. What do I do if that happens?” Key continued, still crying as the brothers held on to each other, Jonghyun mentally swearing that he would find Onew for Key no matter the obstacles.
Three days later, the brothers received an invitation. “Jjong, it’s a wedding invitation for us! I wonder who would be getting married.” Key said excitedly as he opened the envelope.
Jonghyun had a gut feeling that Key wouldn’t like what he might see but before he could manage to stop Key from reading it, he heard a gasp and the invitation fluttered to the floor. Sobbing, Key ran up the stairs into his room, slamming the door behind him. Picking up the card, Jonghyun was only slightly shocked to read that Onew was planning to get married in three weeks. He was pretty sure that there was another reason Onew was doing this. However, he now knew that he couldn’t continue to take his time looking for Onew. Jonghyun quickly made a call and uttered a few curt words before he climbed the stairs to Key’s room to comfort his brother.
A couple of days later, Jonghyun had gotten all the information he wanted. He immediately got on his private plane to confront Onew. He had a show to put on.
Onew was not having a good day. He had woken up with an uneasy feeling but had gotten ready for class despite everything. It was Thursday, his longest day of the week for that term. He had to drag himself from one class to another, hating the fact that he never missed a class and never wanted to miss any in the future.
When he finally managed to get to go home after the numerous classes and project meetings after that, he was exhausted. However, when he stepped into his apartment, his guard immediately went up, causing him to look around nervously.
He noticed a figure sitting alone on his couch but before he could do anything, he heard Jonghyun’s voice as the table lamp on his side table came on. “How could you hurt him?” Jonghyun menacingly called out to Onew as he turned around to face the older guy. “He was already so upset that you didn’t reply him and now, you hurt him even more?! I don’t understand this, hyung. Did the two years together mean nothing to you? Do you have any idea how much you mean to Kibum? You know, if you didn’t love my brother, you didn’t have to string him along in the first place!” Jonghyun growled as the sound of Onew’s sobs filled the room.
“Why are you crying now? The damage is already done! Kibum had been constantly crying his eyes out, all worried that you’d found someone new, someone better than him and that you were too busy with your new whoever that you couldn’t even make time for him!” Jonghyun continued as Onew’s face paled. “You just had to prove him right, didn’t you?! Frankly, I had been looking for you to tell you to make time for Kibum but that was before we received the invitation. I have no idea why I’m here now. I will simply leave so just forget I ever came here. I wish you all the best for your marriage. Goodbye, Jinki-hyung.”
Jonghyun walked past Onew when he heard the elder whisper something. He twirled on his heels as he grabbed Onew by the shoulders. “What did you say? Are you for real? Dad asked that of you?” Jonghyun exclaimed; Onew nodding in reply as tears continued to fall from his eyes. “Why didn’t you tell us? You’ve made Kibum so worried and upset! Come, sit down and tell me everything,” Jonghyun ordered Onew as he pulled the other into a chair and sat across him.
‘I’m done crying! I’m going to get over him if it’s the last thing I do!’ he thought to himself, seething angrily.
The next day, Jonghyun got a call from his housekeeper, saying that Kibum was currently throwing a huge tantrum and smashing everything in sight, especially the presents from his boyfriend. As Onew sat across his dining table, listening to the conversation that was on speakerphone, he was upset and immediately blamed himself for hurting the one he loved.
“I hate myself, Jjong. I don’t deserve someone like Kibum. I can’t follow you back. Kibum doesn’t need to see me plus he hates me now,” Onew said after Jonghyun hung up. Onew’s tears were freely rolling down his cheeks as he silently got up and headed to his room but Jonghyun caught his arm and stood up, getting right into Onew’s face. “What…?” Onew started but was brutally cut off.
“Seriously, Lee Jinki… Why are you being such a pussy?! There’s someone over in Korea that needs you right now and all you can think about is about yourself and how much you feel guilty about this situation? Why don’t you do something about it instead?
Kibum is upset; you have no fucking idea how much he misses you for the whole year you’ve been here doing God-knows-what! If he rants at you, obviously it’s because you deserve it! You could have told Kibum the reason you had to leave! He would’ve understood and found a way out but no! You had to do it the hard way and hurt him. If anything, you should go back so that Kibum has a chance to get back at you for hurting him in the first place!” Jonghyun growled. Still crying quietly, Onew simply nodded as the both of them went to pack some items for the trip.
Upon reaching the Kim household, the housekeeper came forward to Jonghyun. “Kibum-sshi has been breaking more things after breakfast. I’m not sure if it’s still presents from Onew-sshi that he is throwing around anymore,” she said with a slight nod to Onew. She actually liked Onew since he had made Key more tolerable to work for and even if it was selfish of her, she hoped that they could get back together, for Key’s happiness as well as her own.
With that as a warning to Key’s current mood, they headed upstairs where the smashing was more audible. It was coming from inside Key’s room. As they stood in the hallway, Onew piped up as he shuddered, “I don’t think I have the guts to go in there, Jjong.”
Jonghyun sighed; he had his work cut out because this couple would be the death of him. Patting Onew on his back, he said, “Don’t throw away something you love just because someone wants you to. Go and get him back. Hwaiting!” and pushed Onew slightly in the direction of the closed door.
Onew froze, taking a deep breath and gathering his courage before knocking on the door. The reply came back in the form of a loud thud against the door and a shouted “Get lost! I said I don’t want to be disturbed!” which caused Onew to cringe. He would have bolted off if it wasn’t for Jonghyun.
At the other’s insistent urging, Onew opened the door and thanks to Key’s fast reflexes, immediately caught an alarm clock on his forehead, doubling over and groaning as he did so. Quick as a flash, Key was on him and fawning over him, apologising profusely before he realised that the guy underneath him was Onew.
“You’re such a bastard, why did you come back?! You always keep hurting me! I don’t even know why I love you anymore! All you ever do is constantly hurt me! I hate you, Lee Jinki!” Key screamed in Onew’s face, tears cascading down his face before he abruptly got up and stomped off, not noticing the tears that fell from Onew’s wide eyes, shocked and hurt by Key’s words.
However, Key didn’t get far. Jonghyun came forward and grabbed his younger brother from behind, exasperatingly pulling him and Onew whom had just stood up, making them stumble. He harshly dragged them to his room and slipped out, locking them inside together as they heard him chuckle to himself.
Key, already furious from before, yelled out, “Fuck you, Kim Jonghyun! I’m going to make sure Dad will tear down your bloody door! You will regret using the special lock against your own brother!” The two brothers had special electronic locks installed inside and outside the room that only unlocked the door when their password was typed in so as to prevent break-ins from affecting their room. Jonghyun had made use of the fact that Key didn’t know his latest password to lock his brother in his room, causing Key to get angrier that he already was.
As Onew looked on, it occurred to him that everything Mr Kim had said to him during the second meeting was true. Key and Onew would always be worlds apart and he needed to understand that. He had harboured a hope that in time, their relationship would finally be blessed but now, even he agreed that they were not meant to be.
He could never be able to make Key happy. Key loved being spoilt but if they stayed together, he would never be able to buy anything Key wanted. He wouldn’t be able to lavish Key with presents, especially since Key loved expensive branded items. He was not like Minho who was rich like them. It had never been about gay love; it was about status. Onew can never fit in because he had no money to his name and he had to constantly keep that in mind.
As Onew sat there contemplating his life, he slowly realised that the room had gone quiet and Key was nowhere to be seen. Panicking, Onew stood up and ran around the room, looking for Key only to find him crying on the cold floor of Jonghyun’s bathroom. He slowly walked up to Key, calling out softly, “Kibum - Key, are you alright? The bathroom’s cold. Why don’t you…?”
Before Onew managed to finish what he wanted to say, Key cut in, “I’m fine, Onew-hyung. I understand that you would rather be anywhere but here and that you’d rather not talk to me. I apologise on Jonghyun’s behalf for locking you in with me when you’d probably have better things to do. I will not disturb you since you look like you rather not have me around anyway. I’m sorry.”
Onew inhaled a sharp breath, absolutely hating the fact that Key was trying to be strong for him. He had always been the one for Key when the younger needed a listening ear or a shoulder to cry on. Onew was the one that was strong for Key and it was all so fucked-up that he had to fend for himself; looking like the red-nosed reindeer for which he could never remember its name.
“Key… Kibum, I… I still love you,” Onew said, mentally smacking his self the moment the words tumbling from his mouth for he could see the hurt clouding over Key’s features the moment he said it. Shaking his hands as if to deny his words, he tried to come closer to explain what he meant but ended up slipping on a rug and falling onto Key, causing the younger to squeak in surprise.
Onew’s head was on Key’s chest when he looked up into the other’s eyes which were wet with tears. There was fear portrayed in Key’s eyes as he stared at Onew, his lips quivering. “Hyung, I know you don’t care but I’m begging you, please don’t lead me on anymore. There’s only so much I can take. I’m just asking for one thing… Stop hurting me already,” Key pleaded softly as his moist eyes got bigger and wetter, fat tears sliding down his cheeks even as he tried to keep it in.
Without waiting for any reaction from Onew, Key pushed him off and ran out of the bathroom but Onew chased after him and tackled him onto the bed, pinning Key underneath him. Even though Key tried to struggle away, Onew managed to keep him in place, earning a shriek of frustration from the younger boy.
“Kibum, I need you to listen to me. Stop struggling! Just listen and I won’t disturb you again,” Onew implored to Key. Managing a glare as well as a pout while looking extremely adorable doing so, Key nodded so Onew continued, “Mr Kim asked me to leave you because I’m not rich. He bought me off and I allowed it! He said that he’d make you hate me if I didn’t listen to him… And I didn’t want that to happen to us.”
“You mean, my father?” Key asked and the other nodded.
Onew continued, “Kibum, I’m sorry that I hurt you but I had to do it. In fact, I wanted to do it because really, how can I make you happy if you stay with me? I can’t shower you with gifts the way you’d want me to. I can’t spoil you with everything you want. I can’t keep up your lifestyle even if I worked three jobs. I want you to be happy and I know that happiness for you would not be from me.
I have nothing to give except myself and I love you too much to let you settle for anything other than the best. I love you with all my heart Kim Kibum… But I can’t ever call you mine,” Onew said with a hint of sadness. Silently, he hugged Key and got off from the bed before curling up in a corner, sniffling as he tried to hold in his tears.
A moment later, a shaky voice reached his ears. “You… You didn’t need to do this. I could have…”
“No, Kibum. If you stay with me, he’ll disown you… And I can’t let that happen,” Onew interjected and the room fell silent again.
Meanwhile, Jonghyun was pacing outside. After Key had screamed at him, there wasn’t a sound coming from the room which could only mean that they were ignoring each other. Jonghyun knew that Key always screamed when he was in an argument and silence would simply mean the opposite, right? Sighing and shaking his head, he thought, ‘I’m always stuck doing everything here,’ as he walked up to his bedroom door and pressing his password.
Stepping inside, he noticed two pairs of red puffy eyes staring at him, one on the bed and the other in the opposite corner of his room. Sighing again, Jonghyun addressed Key, “So you know the whole story now?” who nodded, looking absolutely crestfallen. “Oh God, why are you so meek now? Since you really love Jinki-hyung, why don’t you go up to Dad and explain things to him? Fight for your relationship, God-damn-it!
Did you think I didn’t have this happening to me? Frankly, you guys have it easy! Money can be earned! Did you know how difficult it was for me to make Dad accept Minho as my boyfriend?” Here, Jonghyun paused to catch his breath, having said the whole thing in two breaths.
Suddenly, he heard a chuckle coming from his bed right before a ball of Key slammed into him. Jonghyun barely managed to hold on to Key to stop him from falling. “You are so right, Jjong! I really didn’t think about it! Thank you so much! I love you, Jonghyunnie!” Key giggled out, his eyes in perfect moon shapes because he was grinning from ear to ear.
“Hey, I already have Minho. Yours is over there,” Jonghyun nodded to Onew whom had stood up and was walking towards them, a slight smile on his face. Jonghyun quickly untangled Key’s legs from around his body and handed him over the Onew who looked extremely ecstatic to be holding Key in his arms once more.
Of course, Mr Kim was livid when he saw Onew with Key when he came back from work but Key had dragged him to the study before he had even managed to get a word out. Onew had gotten increasingly nervous as the hours ticked by and he didn’t want his boyfriend to handle anymore of his father’s harsh words.
Onew had sat in the entertainment room with Jonghyun, fretting while the younger had tried, to little avail, to calm him down. When Key and Mr Kim had returned a long moment later, he had a begrudging look on his face but his words were sincere. “Onew, apparently Kibum really loves you and he said that you make him really happy. I’d allow you to be with him on the conditions that you take care of him well. As well as the other thing I mentioned… It still stands.”
“What do you mean? You didn’t mention anything about this, Dad!” Key interrupted.
“Relax Kibum. Mr Kim wanted me to be a man of status before he would consider our relationship together,” Onew explained. Seeing that Kibum was about to retort, he continued, “And no, I’m not saying this just to protect your father from you.” Turning to Mr Kim, he continued, “I will try my best to do as you say and also treat Kibum well,” and bowed, earning one from Mr Kim as a non-verbal agreement.
Pouting, Key acquiesced. “Fine then… And thank you Dad,” Key said as he hugged his father. Smiling, Mr Kim simply ruffled his youngest son’s hair before he stepped out of the room. Looking back to his boyfriend, Key walked into Onew’s embrace, happy to be in his arms once again.