FUCK! I just deleted my WHOLE entire. I hate when that shit happens. Basically it was like this:

I HAVE CONTROL, YIPEE!!!
My parents are catching on, must be more discreet.
I love working out, being hungry, and feeling light.

Keep me strong and stay with me.

I'm not even going to get into it....I want my control back.

90 cal breakfast bar
150 cal slim fast
30 cal/15 pieces of broccoli/cauliflower
270 cal veggie pizza
90 cal tofu ice cream

total: 630 cals
worked out: -365 cals

Made it out to about a 265 cal day.

Dear God, please let me start losing.

That's it! I'm so fucking sick of this.

I'm huge. I'm disgusting.

I'm getting on track once and for all. God, I hate reading when others yo yo, I use to pride myself of being so strong. And now, I'm a mess! I'm not even going to lie and say I've been good the last few weeks. I haven't. I have started going to the gym daily. But eating wise, I feel ( Read more... )

Well,  I can say I've tried. For the last few weeks I've tried my best. Eating isn't my problem. It's definetly hard to loose weight when you're an alcoholic. From wines to beers and shots, all those calories add up. At the end of the day, I'm alone, sad, and huge.

So here I go for day one. Today I actually had control. The struggle I'm dealing with ( Read more... )

But that's what everyone says, don't they?

I fell off the bandwagon, about 2 years ago. I'm not recovered. I still have my occasional binge/purge sessions. I still have my days counting calories. I still will want that piece of candy so I'll chew and spit. I can't loose any of that because, sadly, that's who I am deep down. What blinded me for the ( Read more... )

 i swear.

i hateeeee fighting with my boyfriend. but i really can't stand him going to clubs. fuckkk. is that so bad of me to not want my boyfriend to go to a club without me? am i thatt weird?

gbsjbngbdsf,kgj@!!!!!!!!!!!

i'm going to go workout.

I've been doing awesome for the last few days.

I'm finally getting into what I missed for too long.

I love control.