Dear me ( Read more... )

She's said it. The three dirty words. Those mushy little confessions the world seems to like revolving around. But I'm not buying it. I'd like to sell my soul, but I've got no soul to sell in this case. I can't let myself fall in love, because I have no desire for it. She doesn't make me burn ( Read more... )

Accepting what has happened and what is still happening has helped me transcend my sense of fear and panic. Still unsteady as a twirling glass I'm still prepared to live a life to the full. Even though the odds have been against me, everything has managed to go wrong. My mind hurts and my soul aches. Wow. What a fucking life. 

Reveal the darker softer pulse in me ( Read more... )

I love this little place. It's like a home for the damned. A daftly constructed sanctuary where I could hide from her for a short moment, feel less addicted to her even though I know the things she gives to me given that I hadn't form such an intensive attachment to her, is merely not enough.

There can be no conclusion to this problem, the dual ( Read more... )

I saw for the first time my girlfriend crying yesterday night. She was crying heaps today again. I don't know why I should really be supporting her but there's this bitter envy towards her and her good life. It's made me realise even how less and how lowly my living standards have been, the loneliness that someone as 'supposedly lonely' as my ( Read more... )

Misery is not a self infliction but a reaction to the external world. I myself am prepared to not react anymore, numb is so appealing when in the past several months all I ever feel is a sense of fear, a non ending stream of anxiety and worst of all, now that I'm out the other end, hardly anyone to share it with ( Read more... )

My girlfriend is the epitomy of the living dead. I have been seeing her for about 2 1/2 months now. Not very long. But issues have already arisen well and truly. She's cynical, I'm not. She's reserved I'm not. She's not in love...I'm not. We are both in the same stages of life...we're about to travel together overseas for a month..where we can test ( Read more... )

At the moment there is a car alarm going off non stop atm outside my house and it's really really annoying ( Read more... )

Frustration is when there is no one to show you a way out.
Frustration is when you're all alone sitting in front of a blinding screen
Frustration is when the sound of the cello is your only comfort.
Tears drain away from your eyes.

Frustration is when there's really nothing you can do about anything. No one hears no one wants to see.