i know how you feel. seems like your having just as bad of a day as i am. i hate feeling sorry for myself though. i hate doing lj updates when im in a shitty mood. but at the same time, it feels somewhat better to vent.
you know, teachers are wrong. catharsis does help relieve your anger, no matter what they say. remember freshman year it was you who told me that it doesnt matter what college you go to? that a graduate from some unknown random college can work alongside a graduate from say, harvard? well now its time to return that message
you know ive always been a lazy guy with the mind of a perfectionist. when i try to convince you that colleges dont matter i am trying to convince myself at the same time. but the point is, its a stupid thing to stress out about. the only thing we can do is worry.
ah but you are wrong, you can do much more than just worry. i have witnessed the same trend in you year after year, you want to do well but you dont have the motivation at the time to carry you through. just to name some examples, ap euro, volunteering, dvc classes last summer... and ive tried to motivate you but it hasnt worked very well. my one success was making you take honors chem last year. and every time, you go on to regret missing out on it. and now that you are starting to feel the crunch of college acceptance, you regret not having tried earlier on. but its never too late, you might think that if you start now, it will have no effect, but it will. its never to late to get out of your bad habits, and now is as good a time as any. one thing that you have done this year is sign up for dvc classes over the summer, that was a good move. you make my proud!
please do write more ross - i really enjoy reading it - i connect to it i guess - i know im not applying to colleges yet and im not as old as you - but i do relate - and i do like reading your journal - kind of comforting i guess - i know what you mean when you say dont take it for granted with your dad - i feel as though i do - i barely ever get to see him - and when i do see him we fight - and now i say all this bad stuff about him and kind of forget about all the great stuff i have done with him - thanks for giving me some perspective -
one more thing - in no way are you ruining the livejournal community - i dont think livejournal is really here for you to write every thing you did today - it is for things like this -to get what you are thinking out - infact more posts should be like this one
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hope things get better
<3 laur
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write as much shit as you want in your journal. its yours. no one else's. and people DO read it.
have good times with your dad.
peace
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ah but you are wrong, you can do much more than just worry. i have witnessed the same trend in you year after year, you want to do well but you dont have the motivation at the time to carry you through. just to name some examples, ap euro, volunteering, dvc classes last summer... and ive tried to motivate you but it hasnt worked very well. my one success was making you take honors chem last year. and every time, you go on to regret missing out on it. and now that you are starting to feel the crunch of college acceptance, you regret not having tried earlier on. but its never too late, you might think that if you start now, it will have no effect, but it will. its never to late to get out of your bad habits, and now is as good a time as any. one thing that you have done this year is sign up for dvc classes over the summer, that was a good move. you make my proud!
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- i know what you mean when you say dont take it for granted with your dad - i feel as though i do - i barely ever get to see him - and when i do see him we fight - and now i say all this bad stuff about him and kind of forget about all the great stuff i have done with him
- thanks for giving me some perspective -
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