FREE TIBET*

*with the purchase of a Tibet of equal or greater value.

To: All of you ( Read more... )

-Amsterdam

In an early afternoon heist of epic proportions, silktrain was kidnapped by ninjas wielding nothing but a stale crust of bread and the smell of rotten tuna. Onlookers were stunned at the daring and sheer nerve of the operation ( Read more... )

So I went out tonight... Now for the good vs. bad list:

• Good: Went to a club with some co-workers
• Bad: Ended up dancing grinding with a very cute co-worker
• Good: I'm single.  I'm allowed to do this.
• Bad: I'm her immediate supervisor.
• Good: She started it, and I kept in mind that due to our supervisor/subordinate relationship, nothing should would happen

So, at work today, over the "Shop While You Bop" satellite music station, they played "I'm Gonna Make You Love Me" by The Supremes, and I thought to myself, "Self, that is really one messed up song lyric. I'm Gonna MAKE You Love Me?" Granted it was released in 1967, and may not have had the same interpretation as it would today, but it got me to ( Read more... )

Just about fell off my chair laughing, while going "Eeewwwwwww!" when watching this!

December 25th (From the law offices Dooey, Cheetum, and Howe)

Dear Madam:

This is to acknowledge your latest gift of twelve fiddlers fiddling, which you
have seen fit to inflict on our client, Mr. Mark Klassen. The destruction,
of course, was total. All future correspondence should come to our attention.
 If you should attempt to reach ( Read more... )

December 24th

Listen Idiot:

What's with the eleven lords a-leaping? All of the birds are dead. I hope
you're satisfied, you rotten halfwit.

Your sworn enemy, Mark Klassen

December 23rd

Bitch!

Now there's ten "ladies" dancing - I don't know why I call them ladies. Is
that skank I smell? Now the cows can't sleep and they've got diarrhea. My
 living room is a river of poop. The commissioner of buildings has subpoenaed
 me to give cause why the building shouldn't be condemned. I'm sicking the
 police on you.
( Read more... )

December 22nd

Hey:

ENOUGH! What are you? Some kind of sadist? Now there's nine pipers playing. And do
 they play! They never stopped chasing those maids since they got here yesterday
morning. The cows are upset and are stepping all over those screeching birds. No
wonder they screech. What am I going to do? The neighbors have started a ( Read more... )