THE FIRST EVER LIVEJOURNAL BRAGGING CONTEST

[silverpenlight]

FIRST EVER, DIRECT FROM ME TO YOU

LIVEJOURNAL BRAGGING CONTEST
'08

I think it's time we all blew a little steam off, and what better way then a bragging contest? The rules of play are simple, so if you've never even heard of this before, no problem.
The idea is, quite simply, to out-brag someone else. So to begin, you comment with something you've done

Comments

[silverpenlight]

I once ran across Canada barefoot!

[wanttobeatree]

Bitch, please. I flew across Canada. With wings fashioned from the skins of bears I had KILLED WITH MY TEETH.

[silverpenlight]

Oh, yeah? Well I skated back using ice-skates I'd made from the teeth of mounties that got in my way. AND THEN made the mounties carry me across the ocean so I could do the same thing in the UK.

[wanttobeatree]

Pfft. I killed all your neighbourhood mounties by throwing bears at them, and used their corpses to build a bridge to take me from Canada to CHINA.

[silverpenlight]

WELL I ROBBED ALL SIX OF THOSE BANKS, AND I DRANK ORANGE GUAVA JUICE WHILE DOING IT.

[coffeeshopnight]

YES WELL -- I WITNESSED SEVEN MURDERS, ALL WHILE BUNGEE JUMPING FROM THE TOP OF THE EMPIRE STATE BUILDING WEARING A GORILLA SUIT AND DRINKING KOOL-AID.

[rushin_doll]

I was the one committing those bank robberies. Right after I turned the entire world (except you) upside down and made some purple guava juice for anyone who wanted to watch me work.

[wanttobeatree]

I ONCE WITNESSED A BANK ROBBERY NAKED

[silverpenlight]

I ONCE ROBBED A BANK NAKED.

[wanttobeatree]

I ROBBED YOUR MUM NAKED.

[silverpenlight]

I ROB YOUR MUM NAKED EVERY THURSDAY AFTERNOON.

[djshangrila]

I bench pressed Rhode Island.

[silverpenlight]

I bench pressed Rhode Island and the state of New York together. Twice.

[djshangrila]

But did you do it while all of their inhabitants were naked?

[silverpenlight]

Naked and dipped in chocolate, bb.

[a_is_for_amy]

I performed brain surgery on MYSELF using a spoon, dental floss and three paper clips, and raised my own IQ by twenty points.

[silverpenlight]

Well, I went back in time and performed brain surgery on Darwin using only two small birch twigs and a pair of men's underwear, before telling him that we evolved from apes.

BEAT THAT.

[a_is_for_amy]

Pffft! I'm the one that went back in time and made the apes evolve in the first place!

[silverpenlight]

You know what? I'm the one who told those single cells to hurry up and create life.