Comments | silverseastar: The Voyeur Factor

silverseastar

The Voyeur Factor

Jan 12, 2008 10:09

This morning I was thinking how sad it is that we use these "networking tools" like LJ and Facebook that are supposed to connect us or sustain friendships when all they in fact do is make us voyeurs and worse friends ( Read more... )

Comments 11

I sometimes wonder about this too cchanteuse January 12 2008, 20:06:40 UTC

But then I think there's a back and forth to it as well. I think that for those of us with fairly busy lives, it can tend to diminish nominally getting together IRL, but then it can also increase the connectedness we would otherwise have. For instance, I often have 15 min-1 hour at the end of my day to go online. I might not be able to plan ahead or would not make the effort to get together with someone if that's all I had left, so in some ways it keeps me more connected until I have more time. I suppose for those of us who don't plan ahead much for social activities, it keeps us more connected "generally" but less intimately. And for me, nominally (and sometimes more than nominally) decreases the more intimate connection time.

I agree it's something to be conscious about...to really know what is going on in our own lives from week to week. Are we just using it as an easy tool and it's disconnecting us? Or is it ok for the moment, given where my life is at? It's good for me to reassess that now.

Re: I sometimes wonder about this too silverseastar January 14 2008, 17:58:16 UTC

I don't think these venues are wrong or that they don't have their place, but I do see myself being less connected to friends and seeing them in the flesh a whole lot less than I used to. There is a correlation for me.

sumcheekymonkey January 12 2008, 22:06:10 UTC

i kind of thought the voyeur factor was exactly what some people are wanting when they post on their blog?? that we enjoy and indeed expect others will read what we write or else we would post it privately ( ... )

silverseastar January 14 2008, 18:00:41 UTC

I do work a fair bit, albeit way less than you! Parenting for sure takes up time and energy that non-parents can't relate to.

There was a time when I had groups of friends and we would commit to getting together more frequently.

I too feel like a long distance voyeur sometimes... hesperide January 13 2008, 00:09:29 UTC

I would love to be close enough to sneak up on you with hot soup and warm squishy hugs... and find myself with giggly kids to laugh with, and cats to pet and fun conversation. Sadly, the distance is one of the things that makes LJ useful for me ( ... )

Re: I too feel like a long distance voyeur sometimes... silverseastar January 14 2008, 18:02:39 UTC

Of course LJ has it's place. I do enjoy being able to keep up on your trials and tribulations and having a sense of how you are. But you are one of the ones who make LJ interractive for me, vs. just voyeuristic.

*hugs*

Re: I too feel like a long distance voyeur sometimes... hesperide January 15 2008, 05:09:22 UTC

I'm glad to have some interaction, even at a distance. Even when I don't respond, I read your entries with avid interest - even if I do feel like a voyeur sometimes. At least I have an excellent subject to observe. 8)

Besides the fact that I really like you and your family, seeing how you resolve issues, even when you are having a hard time, inspires me to keep slogging forward myself. Your creativity and inventiveness in finding the most positive outcome for all is one of the most amazing and inspiring things about you.

SMOOOOOOOOOOSH!!!

whimsicalzephyr January 13 2008, 02:19:14 UTC

For me, the Internet boosts my social life. I can keep up with what everyone's up to, and it broadens my social circle. As well, I find it makes it easier to plan and schedule things with friends.

silverseastar January 14 2008, 17:57:04 UTC

I like the event planning aspects, yes. I suppose if I joined more communities I could see it broadening my social circle too. I do however feel it doesn't really convey what anyone is truly up to, just snippets, and can lead to an artificial sense of closeness.

lazarus7 January 14 2008, 07:31:51 UTC

I have the same feelings ... I find that I 'know' all these little bits of news and info about my friends lives that I often feel closer to them than I really am, especially if I am not calling them as often / seeing them as frequently because I already feel caught up on their lives.

Speaking of ... want to get coffee or a beer sometime?

silverseastar January 14 2008, 17:54:38 UTC

I would love that! Just say the word.