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I should just go to bed, maybe watch something or read- anything to shut my brain off or just not think about the state of things. I'm feeling bothered by everything; feeling regretful, resentful, angry and in despair. I wonder if my medication will always be enough to keep me from going off the deep end again when feeling this way. I wonder if I ( Read more... ) -
i am jack's wasted life
i've been experiencing an influx of frustration and anxiety with life lately and especially in regards to school. i really don't think i'm going to make it through this course- and the sooner i accept that the better off i'll be. however, i am going to keep plugging away at the course mainly so that i can have the work and studying mostly done for ( Read more... ) -
creeped out
I made the mistake of watching a horror movie last night (Sinister) with S. who fell asleep for most of it. I didn't really know what I was getting into as I knew nothing of the movie. I actually fast-forwarded through parts of it because I couldn't handle the suspense. I found those parts scary, waiting for some loud noise or something to jump out ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
I'm getting over a cold- apparently having your kid cough in your face does spread disease. She also coughed in S's face (who avoided the plague for awhile) with a similar result. Kids = buckets of disease.
My lithium was increased. It was still within normal range, but on the low side. I agreed to the increase to see if I'll feel any better.
I'm ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
My Lithium dose has been increased. Apparently it was still within normal range, but on the low side. But I agreed to try the increase as it might make me feel better; I'll know for sure within a couple of weeks ( Read more... ) -
Lithium
It seems there's some issue with my lithium level, so I'm seeing my doctor tomorrow. If it's not kept within a very narrow therapeutic range, an array of nasty adverse reactions can occur which if I recall correctly can result in seizures, coma and possibly death. So it's very important to have your blood levels checked regularly if you're on ( Read more... ) -
It's going to be a long night
I'm up with M who is sick with something that started off like a stomach flu, but had progressed into more of a cold flu. She's barely slept and is now in bed with me, coughing and sniffling. Earlier today, she coughed right in my face... and the Louis CK bit about parenting from Chewed Up immediately came to mind. Should it be a surprise that I' ( Read more... ) -
hypomanic?
I'm concerned that I might be entering a hypomanic state. This would be the first time I've identified it, although in retrospect I'm pretty sure I've been there before. I'm not 100% on this because there might be other explanations- ADHD not being well-controlled or perhaps anxiety over my school situation. I note the ADHD because I'm having a ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
Just spent some time Googling some project-related things which somehow lead to mental illness and spirituality. A good read on that topic is Sean Blackwell's Am I Bipolar or Waking Up? There was some sort of support group at one point that could be accessed through his website, but I can't find it. This is unfortunate because I would have been ( Read more... ) -
the project
The need to write is coming on strong lately; as it tends to do when my mind is restless ( Read more... )