-
To be continued?
Murdered, but not quite dead.
I would like to pick up the pieces of her fractured, desecrated head.
-
Sneaky self-talk
I just became aware of some negative self-talk while studying. It wasn't at all intentional, and yet it was there enough to make me stop what I was doing and then wonder why I was feeling so frustrated. And so I realized my brain was talking shit behind my back.... It was basically telling me that I'm going to have a hell of a time remembering what ( Read more... ) -
my fear: listen, respond and learn
I just read this: http://www.davidmansaray.com/dealing-with-anxiety and thought I might journal based on his advice ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
My attention span for studying is shit today. The anxiety or lack of self-control or whatever it is needs to calm down so I can focus. I feel very badly/guilty that I can't seem to buckle down. The lithium/caffeine shakes arent helping either. I'll keep trying though.
-
good night
i am so tired. ready for sleep. and holding on to the vision of what life could be like if i get my shit together and make sure it's not all for nothing. i picture being a lot less stressed out- mostly because our financial situation will be better and i'll be done my courses...... too tired to write more. good night. -
doubts
This is beyond self-doubt. Recently I have been subjected to the negative energy of my family. My mom; "you don't have to do this". And S.; "maybe nursing is just not for you". Wow, thanks for the encouragement. It's not that I haven't had my own self-doubts about this over the years, but why now? Because I failed that course? I had optimism in ( Read more... ) -
Family
I'm supposed to be studying but didn't allow myself enough time and will have a hell of a time focussing knowing that I only have 30 mins. Journaling is a better idea ( Read more... ) -
Life
If I could start all over again, I would put more emphasis on arts/crafts and writing. See if I could generate some income off of it. It's not something I can act on now, but maybe someday as a hobby of sorts. Currently, I don't even have time to work on my stained glass project that's been an on/off pursuit for several years. And I would still ( Read more... ) -
copy and paste
Just a comment from a forum I wrote. I'm kind of in the mood to journal, but don't have a lot of time at the moment; so here it is:
"Journaling usually does help... at least in terms of feeling some relief from my frustrations. I ended up figuring out what I should do in the middle of the night when I randomly woke up; then was so excited about ( Read more... ) -
ambivalence
I should be studying, but I'm trying to give myself permission not to today. I'm living today at my own pace (and the kids'..). I'm not going to pass this course anyway, so why be so driven to study all the time? It's like an obsession always at the front or back of my mind. I've been so stressed about it that it's been giving me chest pains. It ( Read more... )