I am putting my life on hold (again) until June to look after my mom. This morning I woke up and she was trying to put on a t-shirt. Trying to put her legs through it, that is ( Read more... )

I wish I had never been born.

Nothing has improved. She seems weaker. If I'm not here in the afternoon, who is?

Friend: I think you have a habit of talking yourself out of admitting that someone likes you, by idealizing them, as a way of putting yourself down

Me: So, what's wrong with that?

I want to find a girl who I can love and who can love me. And do you know what? Moving and having a purpose in life will help me in this regard. At the moment, I find nothing redeeming in myself and it leads to some rather peculiar behavior.

Today I received three calls from NECI about my application, financial aid stuff and one more just to wake me up from a nap. This thing that I've been talking about for the better part of a year now is finally coming to fruition. There hasn't been a day since graduation in which at least a portion of my mental energy (mostly worry) has been ( Read more... )

Life is worth living, I believe that. But my life in particular...not so much.

I'm having a harder time justifying my existence lately. The plain fact is that I am a college graduate who is living at home and delivering pizzas. I spent four years at what is supposedly the best school in my state only to find myself handing food to assholes hoping for a few bucks ( Read more... )

Starting livejournal again...why would I want to do a thing like that ( Read more... )

"you you you yooooooooooou. you you you you you you, you. yoooooooooooou"

I think it was a hymn, but I couldn't say which one.