017 | Video

[ebony_mask]

[Black Mask is sitting in a leather office chair, petting a kitten: a pink Siamese with gold eyes, a gray-white blotch of fur on its face, and black ears and tail. The animal curled up in his lap looks quite pleased to be there--the obvious mutual affection may be unnerving.]I lost custody of my goddamn sea monkeys, and my elf is a sex slave, so I

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[ysobritish]

...

[Liquid sits, his hands folded in his lap, in a church pew opposite the NV.]

Ah, so that's where that little womanizing stray went.

[Banana, in all her pale grey stubbornness, hops up behind him.]

Drowning it isn't a good idea. Banana would be most unhappy if the father of her children died.

[ysobritish]

Father named her. All of Ocelot's cats were named after weapons.

...

Don't ask. Father used some absurd things on the battlefield.

[ebony_mask]

I'm asking.

[ysobritish]

...

[A sigh.]

From what I gather, when he had nothing else, he uh, used to sneak up behind enemy soldiers and poke them in the back with the banana. They mistook it for a gun and surrendered.

[ebony_mask]

So...why did you name the cat Banana?

[ysobritish]

...I didn't. He did. Because it fit with the weapons theme, I suppose.

[ebony_mask]

Sorry, I was only half-listening, largely because I don't know who the fuck Ocelot or your Father are.

[ysobritish]

Then don't ask questions if you're unwilling to listen to the answers. [He rolls his eyes, a little less riled up than you'd expect.]

Listen up. Banana is named after a banana that Big Boss, my father, used as a weapon. Banana and the other eleven cats were all named after weapons by him back when Revolver Ocelot, my subordinate, was here because they were his cats. When Father disappeared and Ocelot was killed, the cats passed down to me.

And it appears I'm getting more thanks to your new pretty pink pussy there.

[He stretches, seeming far more relaxed.]

[ebony_mask]

[Laughs a the last bit.]

Somewhere, Yaha is touching himself to the thought that we're now distantly related through the cats.

[ysobritish]

[Liquid laughs too.]

I would not be surprised. Although he isn't likely to be pairing us up.

[ebony_mask]

That's right; you're with Shinji now, aren't you.

[ysobritish]

[A beat.]

...how did you know that?

it...WAS on the network, right? if not, i can delete

[ebony_mask]

The Network, dummy.

It was. XD

[ysobritish]

[. . .]

[Liquid had thought Roman was dead at the time and didn't expect him to have glanced over such a mundane post.]

[. . .]

WHY ARE YOU BRINGING THIS UP?

[ebony_mask]

You brought it up first, slick.

[ysobritish]

...I didn't mean it to come across like that.

[Sigh.]

Right. So I'm dating Shinji. Going to get jealous?

[His tone takes on a teasing note.]