I just deleted a good portion of my journal. That stuff doesn't matter to me and I don't care if I remember it.

I had a panic attack last night. I haven't had one in months. I thought both of my roommates were in their beds, and right when I started thinking about whether the door was locked or not I heard someone open the door and come into the room. My heart started pounding and I was paralyzed. I couldn't breathe all of the sudden... Its like the fear ( Read more... )

I think I spend too much time worrying instead of enjoying. I worry about papers due and books to be read... The paper is just a tiny fraction of my life, why do I let it consume me and wear me out? Its the same with Alex. Why do I spend my time worrying about who hes talking to, whos hitting on him, etc. when instead I should be grateful and ( Read more... )

I got to see Alex yesterday!!! :-) I missed him like whoa while I was gone. It was mighty nice to see him ( Read more... )

I didn't realize how much I missed my dad until I saw him ( Read more... )

It sucks when you want to help someone who used to be a big part of your life, but you are so far away and have no means to help. I feel like I used to be a positive influence to him, and I guess I always thought that he could talk to me about anything and that one day he'd be the man I've always seen in him. I read his journal and it makes me ( Read more... )

I've been happy this last week.... Really happy... But it seems like my body is falling apart ( Read more... )

I guess I lost my faith ( Read more... )

Alex ( Read more... )

I haven't gotten much sleep because everytime I close my eyes, I see him with another girl. And thats what makes me want to die... I feel like he's giving away whats mine. And the thought of never touching him like that again physically hurts every part of my body... even my toes. I want to be the one smelling him. I want to be the one touching ( Read more... )