ive been awake for 23 hours.
i hate school.
i think im going to fail and lose my scholarships.
my wrist hurts.
my jaw hurts.
my body is vibrating im so cold.
skipping classes tomorrow, im too sick and too tired.
fuck everything, i dont want to grow up.
i dont even wanna move.

yay, so im on on hour 15 of my fast .
♥

fuckfuckfuckfuck.

i fucked up today, and binged WHEN I COULD HAVE HAD A PERFECT FAST DAY >:|

i hatehatehate when this happens .
because i always fuck up .
i cried and broke down and just fucked up .

NOT TOMORROW .
NO FOOD TOMORROW AT ALL .
i cant .
not tomorrow, not wednesday, not thursday, not friday.
idk how spinning class on thursday night will end ( Read more... )

im in so much paaiaianaaiiaian ( Read more... )

it's the most intense thunderstorm ever right now ..
crazy .
it's 12:56pm, and i've consumed:
- a small handful of soledad almond mix (100cal)
- one cup of black coffee (5cal)
later tonight i'm going to a coffee shop (if this rain doesn't let up) and i'll have a chai tea or turkish coffee or something of the like .

ugh,i'm at 106.4 today ... yuck, still too high, but at least it's lower than 108 !!!
today i ate :
- black coffee ( 5cal)
- oatmeal with cinnamon, apple chunks, trailmix (355cal)
- vanilla rooibos tea with light soymilk (70cal)

total calorie intake at 2:59pm : 430 .
hm ... that's really a LOT ...
i think i'm done for the day .

107 .
oneohseven ,

FUCK THAAAT .
i realized that im ACTUALLY fat .
like .. only if i were 80 some would i truly be skinny ish.
but the problem is that i'll try to get back on track, then i'll get on the scale ... and nothing .
nothing .
i fucking hate not seeing results, and if i dont see results, then i give up .
so that's the shitty cycle i get into .
( Read more... )

homg, i weighed myself this morning ( Read more... )

stats

16, female, amenorrheic
height; 5'5
cw; 103.6
hw; 113
lw; 102.6
gw1; 99
gw2; 90
gw3; 84

i need to figure out how to get to these gws, and fast .
anyone know the fastest way ? including pills ?
im thinking of fasting and exercise .

thanks :)

i weighed myself this morning , 102.6
i don't think it was right ...
i think that's too low .
but im pysched if it's true .
only 12 days until nyc :)::):):):):):):):):):):)):):):):):):):):):):):):)