Today was supposed to be a wonderful day.

I woke up feeling amazing and connected and excited about doing something for myself. I set out to get a haircut.
I had a very specific idea of what I wanted. It was to be exotic, self-affirming, and much more interesting than the boring 'do I've been putting up with for the past two years. I needed my locks ( Read more... )

I'm simultaneously so sad, so mad, and so defeated that I literally do not know what to do with myself. 
I want to die every minute of every day. Because I'm not young, and I'm not naive, and I know exactly what is going on here.
Q.
There is something that happens to a guy when he decides to leave. Something permanent and secret that I can't predict. ( Read more... )

The average poet by comparison 
Is unobservant, immature, and lazy. 
You must admit, when all is said and done, 
His sense of other people's very hazy, 
His moral judgments are too often crazy, 
A slick and easy generalisation 
Appeals too well to his imagination.

Some films are released in the UK and Europe before they make it to America. Others are released in the opposite order. 
In the case of Miranda July's latest feature, The Future, this country is the one that was late in acquiring it. We weren't able to see it until last night, and I think it came out in the US during the summer. This saddens me, ( Read more... )

Tonight is Peruse-Documents-Folder-While-Husband-Plays-Video-Games night! Yay!
I've now made it to the fiction subfolder, inside of which is a thing called "tidbits." It's a collection of miscellaneous scraps of dialogue and half-assed diatribes that don't appear to be connected, and was apparently composed between 2008 and 2010, but I have no ( Read more... )

There's a party in my mind. 
And I hope it never stops.

I seem to be suffering from a continuation of a psychological breakdown that began in Mobile. The longer I lived there, the more I became detached from my surroundings and friends, as well as becoming increasingly cynical, depressed, anxious, dependent on medication. I had the hope that moving would improve my mental state, as I blamed my problems ( Read more... )

Here's an excerpt from a letter I once wrote:

"I’ve mentioned before in passing, owing to no real appropriate opening in any conversation (because the natural ebb and flow of conversation is an art I haven’t and never will adequately grasp), that one of my greatest literary loves is the novel Lolita. I’ve often tried to explain the reason for this ( Read more... )

If this situation doesn't improve, I'll have to return to the impoverished Alabamian outhouse from whence I came.
I'm not kidding. Things are getting bad.

Last week I had to make an emergency visit to a dentist because my bottom left wisdom tooth became infected and turned the entire surrounding gum line into an abscess the size of my little finger. ( Read more... )

Officially, I am a caustic, sarcastic, barbed-tongued cynic that the word "reserved" doesn't even come close to accurately describing. I think I'm polite enough to get by in casual social settings, but the gross excesses, injustices, and just plain depressing shit of the everyday world can't go ignored, and it's my nature to sardonically comment on ( Read more... )