After running away for so long, running in circles, building up a false reality, you are stuck with everything once you stop. All it takes is one breath, one break, and the feeling overwhelms. You try to run away even further, but you're really only running from yourself. The further you get away from you, the harder it is to come back.

Attach yourself to the unchanging
Not the everchanging
Unless the everchanging is unchangeable in essence.

Everyone wants to be loved. There's this pressure in my heart that tells me so. It throbs uncontrollably when I think of how I've hurt those I care about most. I don't know what to do with myself when I feel so crummy. Nothing can pull me up from this pit now; I've dug my own grave, and it's not pretty. I've pushed it all away. I've pushed him away ( Read more... )

Love
is the most
beautiful
desirable
deceptive
addictive
drug
it blinds
the soul
nibbles away at
the mind
my body can feel it
but my heart
won't hear it

hello
my name is human
and my anti-drug
is
nothing
.

Ugh, school sucks. Even though I've only been one day so far this week (which I hate myself for), I still feel the work piling up even more. Now I have to make up sooo many freakin quizzes and tests and homework, and my teachers are all going to ask me where I was, lecture me on my attendance problem, etc. etc. But you know what? School's not worth ( Read more... )

Oh god yesterday was wonderful. Why can't everyday be like that? Over the past few weeks I've grown less and less concerned with my schoolwork. It may just be senioritis kicking in early, or just the excessive amount of stimulation I've been finding in other things (or people) lately. I'm not saying it's bad, though, because what's the point of ( Read more... )

I went to the WJ Sports Banquet tonight (or should I say yesterday). I miss cross country now!! Despite the daily hour and a half practices, it was actually really fun, with all the meets/races and everything. I'm gonna miss having Mr. Dunston and Mr. Martin as coaches....well, at least until spring comes, then I'm going to be on Track & Field!! ( Read more... )

my new lj layout is bootiful

Hello all my wonderful lj friends!! I've not updated in a while, due to my lack of free time and shitloads of homework and such. Taking 3 sciences (2 of them AP, one double period) is a lot harder than I expected, and has left me with a lot more work than I hoped for in my senior year. But, oh well, what can you do? Well, switch out I guess, but I' ( Read more... )

Hurricane Katrina is such a horrible disaster. It's also making evident some of the many flaws of this country. Racism, Bush, poverty, Bush, government....and not to mention Bush, who is not taking the most action he can to try and evacuate and help the victims of the hurricane. he just decides to leave all those decisions to other officials, who ( Read more... )