Silly boy...

[smeeeeeeeet]

I have to write somewhere, so I write here, where I hope no one really looks at, and not in the way where I say that in hopes that someone really WILL see it and blah blah blah. I only turn to live journal for things I don't want to tell anyone else... this is my place to put notes to myself, or to just try to help me figure out whats on my mind

Comments

1.

[smeeeeeeeet]

Note to yourself, be more mindful of when people hurt you. Don't let the ones you love take advantage of you like that anymore. I look back on this and feel so dumb for letting her lead my around by a fishhook lodged in my throat, all the while smiling through tears. You're dumb and self destructive when it comes to relationships I think, it's like you WANT them to hurt you, you just make it so EASY. But how do I learn to stop that? At the time it felt so completely justified, blinded by your love once again. How do I know (in my present situation) I'm not equally if not MORE blind to being mistreated by my love? I just hope I don't laugh as hard as I did at this at what I'm feeling right now? Is it really anyones fault? I have to learn to not blame myself so much...but that's really just my nature...