This is the last chapter before vacation. After this, I'll be posting a chapter every few days because there are 11 more to go and I want to be done by Christmas.
Well. That hurt more than a thing has the right to hurt. I should have known better than to read this in my current state of unrelenting depression (due to my own personal crap) but I've been waiting for this for a while, so I clicked and I read. And I'm glad I did because, though this hurts, it's so good.
It would have been so easy for Sawyer to just yell at Jack, throw him out with little to no explanation. But he didn't. He told him who and what he's done. He could very easily have lied and been callous and cruel to Jack, make himself the bad guy. But instead he opened up to Jack and showed him who he was, told the truth. Then threw him out. And he did it all while looking and Jack and touching him, keeping the connection there, and that is what hurts the most.
“I didn’t know…” Jack swallows hard and bitter tears sting his eyes. “I didn’t know I’d fall in love with you
( ... )
*hugs you* I knew this one would hurt, and I'm so sorry you've got crap going on in RL that hurts, too. *more hugs*
The thing about this scenario, something about it almost struck me as noble, because I think Sawyer really believes that the best -- and maybe the only-- way to get Jack to leave is to force Jack to see him as the man he used to be. But he sold himself out to protect Jack's relationship with his mother. Who totally doesn't deserve it, but she is his mother. Mommy issues are a big theme in this story, and I can't say any more without giving too much away.
Thank you for reading it even though you knew it would hurt. And try to smile; both the fic AND RL will get better, I promise. ♥
Sawyer breaks my heart the way he reacts to Jack saying that. For just a second I thought he was going to break down, but then again that's another thing on his own personal list of things he's not allowed to do. *pets*
Grrr, I want to, like, throw eggs at you right now for putting that TBC there. Um. In a good way.
Sorry it was short; my heart just couldn't take anymore. Poor Sawyer. Poor Jack. Poor us, for having to live through it wigh them. I will throw eggs at myself, then post the aftermath while I'm on vacation, how 'bout that? ♥
But if I may dangle a carrot? Sitck around til chaps. 14, 15, and 16. I think then all shall be forgiven. ;)
*smoochies* and thank you for reading even when it's tough!
you know what? I think that Sawyer just did the right thing while doing a terrible thing. Jack deserved the truth. and I think that Sawyer is absolutely convinced of everything he says (not being good enough, that it's going to end up badly) and that makes it even more sad.
poor poor Jack. BTW I loved how he immediately knew it was his mother's doing somehow.
He did do the right thing, I think. I just don't think he has enough faith in himself (to change) or in Jack (to forgive). There are going to be some mommy issues that serve for the catalyst for whatever resolution there may be. Thank you so much for sticking with it so far, and I hope you'll keep reading! ♥
I'm glad Sawyer at least had the decency to try and explain to Jack what was going on in that head of his, but still, poor Jack. He's always getting his heartbroken through nothing of his own doing. In fact, it often seems the better person he is, the more he gets screwed. :( *hugs Jack, hugs you* Thanks for writing this beautiful 'verse that has the ability to slay me so.
Poor Jack is right -- he's the innocent in all of this, and Sawyer realizes it. The fact that it's breaking Sawyer's heart shows how far he's come, and it hurts me to see him having come so close to redemption he can taste it, only to have fate yank it away from him. This is sort of a Jack/Sawyer vs. Fate story, but the theme is that whatever doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. I hope you'll keep reading even through the dark parts. *loves, appreciates, and hugs you tight*
Comments 25
It would have been so easy for Sawyer to just yell at Jack, throw him out with little to no explanation. But he didn't. He told him who and what he's done. He could very easily have lied and been callous and cruel to Jack, make himself the bad guy. But instead he opened up to Jack and showed him who he was, told the truth. Then threw him out. And he did it all while looking and Jack and touching him, keeping the connection there, and that is what hurts the most.
“I didn’t know…” Jack swallows hard and bitter tears sting his eyes. “I didn’t know I’d fall in love with you ( ... )
Reply
The thing about this scenario, something about it almost struck me as noble, because I think Sawyer really believes that the best -- and maybe the only-- way to get Jack to leave is to force Jack to see him as the man he used to be. But he sold himself out to protect Jack's relationship with his mother. Who totally doesn't deserve it, but she is his mother. Mommy issues are a big theme in this story, and I can't say any more without giving too much away.
Thank you for reading it even though you knew it would hurt. And try to smile; both the fic AND RL will get better, I promise. ♥
Reply
Sawyer breaks my heart the way he reacts to Jack saying that. For just a second I thought he was going to break down, but then again that's another thing on his own personal list of things he's not allowed to do. *pets*
Grrr, I want to, like, throw eggs at you right now for putting that TBC there. Um. In a good way.
Reply
But if I may dangle a carrot? Sitck around til chaps. 14, 15, and 16. I think then all shall be forgiven. ;)
*smoochies* and thank you for reading even when it's tough!
Reply
Reply
you know what? I think that Sawyer just did the right thing while doing a terrible thing. Jack deserved the truth. and I think that Sawyer is absolutely convinced of everything he says (not being good enough, that it's going to end up badly) and that makes it even more sad.
poor poor Jack. BTW I loved how he immediately knew it was his mother's doing somehow.
*HUGS*
I love this fic. and I cannot wait to read more!
Reply
Reply
I'm glad Sawyer at least had the decency to try and explain to Jack what was going on in that head of his, but still, poor Jack. He's always getting his heartbroken through nothing of his own doing. In fact, it often seems the better person he is, the more he gets screwed. :( *hugs Jack, hugs you* Thanks for writing this beautiful 'verse that has the ability to slay me so.
Reply
Reply
(The comment has been removed)
Thank you for sticking around through the tough parts! *loves*
Reply
Leave a comment