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Need A Vent
I need to get out. I sometimes miss my psychosis. I can't focus on any particular thought. I keep rushing to new activities without sticking with them. Guitar, coding, video games. I can't keep my mind focused on one thing. Is the medication part to blame? I miss the voices. They gave me motivation and made me feel so important. That seems to be a ( Read more... ) -
Mercy
O God, am I tragic character? Am I evil incarnate? I have tried to do good and I know I have faltered but do I really deserve this punishment? Is this for real? I feel like I am in hell. I want to cry. I can't kill myself. I would just go to purgatory temporarily. Then I would wake up in some hellhole in India somewhere living a shitty life. I'm ( Read more... ) -
Let It Flow
Busy couple of days. Nothing I couldn't handle! It feels glorious to have days where you work hard and win at almost everything. There are a few cracks in the pavement here and there, but they get forgotten with the speed of my movement.
I love dancers. The best one is the most vibrant.
The next step is to relearn how to fearlessly ride. -
Likening Cyborg
I am growing. I am figuring things out. It's hard but I'm getting there. Every thing is getting amped up ( Read more... ) -
Could Have, Should Have, Would Have
I've had such a great life. Unfortunately I either dwell on all my fuckups and what I could have done better to enhance my memories or I imagine the good times in great detail and fantasize how I would have expanded on that ( Read more... ) -
Just About Giving Up
Well, where to begin ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
Mission Accomplished. -
Mostly Drugs
I have to get out of this place. If I stay I will turn into Skinner. I see the progressions. My gig as a substitute teacher is unfulfilling. I used to be an active educator and now I am just a delegator. I want to contribute more instead of being a pusher ( Read more... ) -
Lucky to Be Alive
And now I'm back ( Read more... ) -
Chin Up
I think like I'm the Benjamin Button of wisdom. It decreases as I get older. I keep losing at what I think is right ( Read more... )