Though the title seems a little melancholy, that's not really the case. It's been almost three years since I have updated. I deleted, then reactivated the account. I'm not sure why really. I started this journal when I was 23-24. I'm 42 now. That's crazy to think about. Life has been good to me though, I cannot complain. Perhaps life was ALWAYS ( Read more... )

So, I never write in here anymore. I've said that same thing in many entries since my posting dwindled, so I guess it's nothing new. Today I was listening to Pandora at work. Berlin's Take My Breath Away came on. I'm not a huge fan of the song itself, but I did love Top Gun as most kids from the 80's, and I got curious and Googled when the song ( Read more... )

It's funny...I re-read entries in here from ten years ago...five years ago...two years ago...and I cannot fathom how melancholy my life seemed to have been. First, when I re-read those entries, I am struck with the thought that I was perhaps a little dramatic and perhaps a little whiney about my lot and station back then. My life, for all intents ( Read more... )

Yup...like a dead end career and to therapy. I'm not whining. I HAVE a job...and for that I'll always be grateful. I've ALWAYS had a job and the ability to make money to support myself, and that's awesome. Unfortunately, I have never had a CAREER I'm happy with. I fucking HATE it here, but that's not new. The job hunt was/is long, tedious, ( Read more... )

I can get up and walk out of here and never...fucking...come back.

Well, not that kind of fear. Not the drug induced fear, not the Hunter S. Thompson fear...but a very real fear none the less. Sometimes at work I get sick of quoting people's insurance, sick of talking to people, sick of work really. So, I zone out and look usless crap up on the internet. Since I don't take a lunch really ever, just ten minutes to ( Read more... )

This is when the chest pains set in. I hope it's not a series of small heart attacks, though it very well may be, but instead just a series of really bad bouts of acid reflux. Days like today make me wonder why I'm still here. My job, as many jobs go, it stressful. I sell insurance, but I am a hybrid agent. This means I not only sell it, but ( Read more... )

A new year. Big fucking deal. Nothing has really changed. Jax has Petrina's immune system and daycare has made him sick once a month since late September. He was sick for Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas. The sickness he's bringing home combined with what Petrina picks up from the little germ factories she teaches, well, let's just say in ( Read more... )

For some reason this month is just making me remember a bunch of shit I'd rather forget.

Not only the T.V. show...but my life. On my Yahoo news feed the other day was a "Growing Pains" cast reunion thing. Naturally I start humming the theme song. Then, naturally, as I have a habit of doing, I IMDB the series, and then think back to how old I was when it came out, when it was running and when it ended. It started in 1985. I was 8. It ( Read more... )