Earlier tonight Janie tried to eat my pin cushion. Smart ( Read more... )

So, I've come up with the oddest and neatest Halloween costume for my sister. Next year she's going to dress up as a reindeer in a cute little toga with a bow and arrows.
Whoever gets the joke, gets a cookie!

(She's going to be Cupid, dorks.)

So, I may very well get kicked out of my class because my teacher is an ass. I figured the warning was probably coming, although emerging from an email I wrote him regarding his completely unprofessional reply to me was surprising ( Read more... )

So I just got finished watching Raising Helen. Barring the fact that it’s a Kate Hudson movie and she’s my soul mate, it got to me ( Read more... )

A man and his wife in court were getting a divorce. The problem was who should get custody of the child. The wife jumped in and said: "Your honor, I brought the child into the world with pain and labor. She should be in my custody ( Read more... )

Damned stupid apes flinging poo at everyone.
And not even the pleasant kind. Legal poo.
I HATE THESE PEOPLE.
A bit of background: During the summer, my family and I went to court for the umpteen millionth time to defend custody against the, well, let's just call them the Evil Invader Monkeys. Now, these apes had been pursuing custody for SIX ( Read more... )

From now on, maybe I will use the translator from dictionary.com for all my entry titles.
Figure it out if you can.

I almost didn't put a comma in there. It read 'no laughing dweebs,' but I would never portray bias to the dweeb population! It is NOT in my nature ( Read more... )

       ( Read more... )

That didn't come from me ( Read more... )