well its like 2am and my hubby woke me so now i cant sleep. Ever feel like something is just not right? I just have this oddist feeelingtonight......maybe anxiety bbut,,,,,,,,,with all the meds I am on I doubt it.

Well I really came on to thank Kimberely for the lovely cared and gift she set from everyone. I think I crued for 20 minutes until Doug told me to knock it off. ITs so nice of everyone. I still have many moments but I try and hide them from Doug and Dan cause it seems to upset them....the other night I fell asleep with Cam's pic in my arms. Was ( Read more... )

hey well today was a complete downer. First thing that happens at work is ssomeone dies.....one that as been around forevr. So that starts my crying. THen when I get home the guy doing the sutopsy on Cam said they are having problems but thtye arent giving up hope to find out the cause becasue the white blood cell count was so high. Now I find ( Read more... )

Benn a little rough lately. Its gonna be 2 months on monday since Cameron became an angel........ I dont but I think its all hitting me first now. I dry for stupid reasons and the meds arent working like they were before. I miss him more andmore and I swear I am going nutz!!!! My friends are always busy so I never see any of them and I dont ( Read more... )

Well I dont thihnnk Kasie has her internet up and running yet so I wanted to let everyone know her brother andhis wife had a beautiful baby girl the other day. I would love to tell you the name but with my memory lately and all the drugs I forgot!!! But I am gonna go see her in a few....much love to all and thanks for all your support and care ( Read more... )

sorry itw been so long but we haqve been moving. We are finally in but stillnot all unpacked. I have been having a rough time with all things but as I am told from the whole frickin world its normal. As you can see I have been a bit of a bitch lately. My new addy is ( Read more... )

If I could have the return of one day ( Read more... )

Well had to come hgome early from work cause blood pressure was real low. I think its the valium but, I dont know. I feel kinda depressed today so that might be it also. I got a call from someone who lost her daughter 5 months ago in a car crash....not sure but I thoguth I heard she burned alive. It was hard but we cried alot together. She ( Read more... )

Well its been awhile since I have done an update but just havent been in the mood. Lots is going on. I see the doc and concelor 1x a week. I still am on major drugs. Effexor and valium. ALOT!!!! But they seem to help alot. The head stone should be up soon so I am happy abou tthat. My EX is being horrible and asking for non stop monney. I ( Read more... )

Okay I just need to say a few things. Right now my son is at homecoming. And as I was riding home by myself from droppping him off I just let lose. Cameron should have been next to me. I miss the smile and the dimple. I know its been a month and things should be getting better but I feel lost. I bitch about everything. I dont understand how ( Read more... )