The move was crazy. I don't even want to elaborate. Just know that I am completely traumatized enough to stay at this law school for three years just to avoid moving again.

I have crazily been considering transferring schools and I haven't even started yet. The issue is, it's really expensive here. But most importantly, this is not the state that ( Read more... )

I don't have a physical type. I used to say the only preference I had was that he was taller than me. I dated a short guy before. I believe we were the same height. It didn't really bother me because I was like 23, and I wore flats almost all the time. I wasn't really into heels at that point. Quite frankly, I was just getting into skirts and ( Read more... )

Moving to Pennsylvania has been a lot. $4000 for movers, $3000 for rent, turn off my electric, internet, renter's insurance here. Turn on my electric, internet, renter's insurance there. Forward all my mail. Arrange a move-out inspection here, arrange a move-in inspection and get my keys there... That's the hardest part because the movers only gave ( Read more... )

I've felt in limbo for a while. Longer than I realized.

I've had so much stuff still at my parent's house. I moved out hastily because I felt pressured. No one that age was still living at home. I let people make me feel bad about it, as if I wasn't independent. And so when I moved out, I left a lot of things. It wasn't the way I wanted to leave. I ( Read more... )

I think about Jesus coming back every time something horrible happens in the world (that I'm aware of). I think about how it would just be simpler to end the world. It's messed up. Start over. Plus, I don't ever want to grieve my immediate family. I'd prefer we all died together when the world ends, so we can all be in heaven together at the same ( Read more... )

I am not yet over him. I realized this last week in several different ways. I'm disappointed in myself, but I know my interest is fading. My only solace is that he all the way thinks I am over him. It's easier for him to believe that because he never really believed I liked him as much as I did in the first place. And that was half the problem.

The ( Read more... )

I'm so sentimental. I want to document my apartment before I go. I love this place. It's been my safe haven during almost my whole 30s. I never thought I'd be here this long because I thought I would get married and buy a house. I always said I didn't want a house without a spouse. I still feel that way, however, that does not pertain to condos. ( Read more... )

I prayed for peace, health, and understanding today. Those three encompass a lot of my inner turmoil. The things I cry and stress about. I need peace of mind. I need better habits. I need to come to terms with all these transitions.

Today, I start my detox. My recommitment. I'm fasting and praying. I always felt like I couldn't do that and was ( Read more... )

I have not been sleeping for more than three hours a night this week. Nothing works. Benadryl, wine, cherry juice, mezcal, watching boring shows, listening to calming music, reading... And I'm actually tired. I get in the bed around 8 or 9pm, I might doze off around 11pm and wake up at 2am and then doze off again as the sun rises, for about an hour ( Read more... )

Reality set in. As badly as I wanted to hurry up and start law school, now I'm stressed about moving. I'm excited to move; I'm just dreading it. It's soooo much work. It's so much change, and it's too much at once. This is EXACTLY why I didn't want to go to school in another state. Just the thought of the adjustment to two different environments is ( Read more... )