There are nights in your life where you leave someone's company feeling better about yourself than you did before. You feel, happier, smarter, shinier, more of yourself. I had two of those this weekend. John, Chandra, Losey, I needed that this weekend. Thank you for reminding me of who I am....I didn't know I had forgotten.

I am Rachel
I am a victim of sexual violence.
No Pity. No Shame. No Silence.

( This moved me today )

FIRSTS ( Read more... )

I don't really update much anymore. Been just trying to live. I do read everyone else though. I'm bald now. Even my eyelashes are falling out. Matt, my dear blessed boy, came up and fed me long island iced tea until I felt brave enough to shave my head, so I wear scarves. The chemo isn't so bad. A couple days of throwing up, I can manage that. The ( Read more... )

So, I have cancer. Early onset transitional cell carcinoma to be exact (bladder cancer). I'll have biotherapy, chemotherapy and some surgery. This sucks, and I'm so full of rage and hate and fear. Such is life.

What doesn't kill us supposedly makes us stronger right? I thought I was strong enough.

Ya know what's fucked up? Its five in the morning and i just stayed up all night watching Sex and the City.

Ya know what's even more fuckedup? I still have a season and a half to watch tommorrow.

I need a life. I figured out that my only friend here is a frenemy....it hurts sometimes

Its been a long long time between postings. Somehow, while I obsessively read my friends' pages, I never have the energy or the desire to read my own. Been pretty depressed and quite frankly haven't wanted to do much but lay around. I'm still working, and I'm actually enjoying my job. I'm just starting to get back on the phones and so that's cool. ( Read more... )

I'm in Wenatchee. Grandad's been transferred to hospice...and somehow since I can't go to AZ, it seemed like the place to be. It made yesterday the longest day ever though. Get up at four (without having actually slept mind you) drive to Everett, turn around drive back to Oly. Throw some more shit in my car, drive here. Got here at two, excited ( Read more... )

Wow I had a lot to drink last night. I do believe it is the first time I've been that drunk since I was like nineteen. I'm usually the caregiver not the care reciever in the whole alcohol situation. I went out with a friend from work...and while it was fun...it was totally not worth this morning...how is it that one only remembers the fun drunken ( Read more... )