I remember it like it was yesterday. Getting the call to say my Grandmother was in the hospital. That things were not looking good. Getting home the next day so I could see her. I am glad I did. It was the last time I got to see her. But it was not her. There in her place was an old woman. One who could barely talk. That was not her. She ( Read more... )

Some times I hate these living arrangements. I realize that there is not much that can be done about some of the issues I have. The FASD and all the things that come with it are something out of his control. The being diagnosed at the maturity level of a 17 year old and the rage which leads to holes in the walls and broken things. Nothing can ( Read more... )

Sitting here you on my mind
Heart heavy
Wanting to reveal my true feelings
Keeping them locked away for one more day
Feelings for you that I will never share

Like the sweet smell of a flower in the summer breeze, you were only here for an instant.

Love
the most powerful word.
No other can bring joy or pain
like this one word.

3am walk in the park
playing on the swings in the dark
my thoughts hidden
like stars is the fog
the loneliness of being without you
surrounds me like the mist in the air
music that reminds me of you
playing in my mind

Feelings I have to hide
the truth locked up deep inside
things I want to say
put off for one more day
Knowing that how I feel is wrong
wrong place wrong time
so I go on
keeping this from you
hoping that one day our souls will cross paths again.

It wouldn`t be fair to you
to continue down this path
Going through the motions
while wanting someone else
Our paths crossed one day
Now they are leading us apart
What was once what I wanted
Is not what I want now
What was a fairy tale
is now a tragedy
So I will go into the unknown
without you at my side.

Why did I let you into my life
Only to push you away
Why did I hold you close
Only to let you go
Most of all
Why did I love you?

This was not my intention, this was never my plan. A heart of ice melted by your smile. My dark soul brightened by the sparkle in your eyes. I want to put my arms around you and never let go.