I'm scared that a horde of spider offspring are going to eat my face while I sleep tonight

[spoonerist]

My sister Phung found a spider's nest on the inside of one of her shirts this morning. This shirt hangs in my study wardrobe, which is approximately two metres to the left of where I'm currently sitting. Luckily, the mama spider wasn't there, but hundreds of her tiny hell spawn baby spiders were. Phung was in a rush this morning, so she threw the

Comments

[unfiltered_]

oh my god.

burn the house down, and move to the moon. it is the only solution.

[spoonerist]

But! Did you know that in Australia spiders can fly? Like thousands of them simultaneously in the clouds above our heads? I can't find the article right now, but it terrified me. The tiny baby spiders cling to the water in the air, and then when it rains, it rains spiders. The pictures made me want to rip off my skin and burn it.

If spiders can fly, what's to stop them from flying to the moon? The devil spawn probably don't even need air. On the moon, all they need is human flesh.

Hold me.

[unfiltered_]

Holy shit. Okay. I'm going to build an impenetrable fortress on the moon, and then electrify it to protect us from the hellspawned, non-respiratory doom spiders. And then nuke the world.

The menace must end.

[noodletail]

................... what.... the..... crap....... D:

Well I'm glad I didn't read this before I went out and faced the rain today.

[likeantelope]

I LOVE SPIDERS

CHARLOTTE'S WEB.