Today were the viewings.  I cried early on, then was fine. At the end, we were all crying.

I tried to kneel and say my final goodbye.  I couldn't convince myself that it was actually my Grandmother in the coffin.  I shed tears whispering to her, but I felt empty.. Disconnected, really.  I felt that my final goodbye in the hospital Monday night was ( Read more... )

I'm 23 and I have yet to experience a family death.  Aside from Bandit, of course, which has thus-far been the most tragic event in my lifetime. But this is rough.. Especially since it hasn't happened yet, but even more because it's so unfair.

My poor Grandmother has done nothing but give and be the kindest and most caring woman. She didn't smoke, ( Read more... )

Updates need to take place more often.  How do I manage to consistently squeeze months of inactivity into this journal? I love to write; however, I seem to lack the drive and motivation to do so anymore.

One of these days.

It’s not really the fact that Scott’s gone. Yes, that is probably the main cause for my misery, but I realize that it’s only for a few more days. I also realize that there will inevitably be times where I won’t get to see him for consecutive days, and those “breaks” are necessary in any healthy relationship, whether I choose to believe that or not.
( Read more... )

Aside from the usual, expected fatigue, my day was off to a great start - My days always are when I get the opportunity to awaken to a reality much sweeter than any possible dream.

I knew I had a decent agenda and decided to take off from class in order to conquer the day’s demands. The tasks that I had accomplished and the quandaries I had ( Read more... )

I'm bringing it back.  That's right.  Why?  Because I miss it. And you do too.. You just won't admit it, you stubborn asses. :o)

What has Erin been up to?  She's living with a roommate (Still in Baltimore), working through school, and has never been happier in her life.

Almost one year ago, I found someone who has made me the happiest I have ever ( Read more... )

I really miss the old LiveJournal-obsessed days. :o(

Is there anyone out there..??

( ((Echo)) )

*Sigh* It'll never be the same.

While I lounge in a padded, rolly chair at the large, handicapped table which I [luckily] managed to snag today, I simply cannot direct my attention toward my Sociology professor's lecture, as it has been this way for weeks. I have other things on my mind. My mind has been preoccupied with other thoughts that are entangled with hopes and dreams ( Read more... )

This guy I have absolutely fallen head-over-heels for showed interest last night.. This never, ever, ever happens. Therefore: It made my life worth living. :o)

As the hours wind down, I can feel myself becoming anxious. What should I say? What will he say? What should I say back to that? What if I say something stupid? I'm going to say something dumb.. .. (Set the play-mode to repeatThe effect he has on me is purely inexplicable. Once I catch a glimpse, I'm in another world. I blank, I can't focus, I ( Read more... )