kind of a random thought post

[starstruckjen]

I feel in the past few days that I'm falling back in COE ways with my eating. I'm not binging, but I eat more than I should, and at times I worry that I won't be able stop. I do believe it's happening because I've gone x amount of days without purging, but I'm still using food for comfort and emotional reasons. I keep thinking I need to back on

Comments

[taboo2you]

it's hard not to slip into old ways. i hear that even completely 'recovered' people still have eating disordered tendencies. you are strong, i know you can do it.

i wish i had more friends too.

[starstruckjen]

yeah it's even harder because I think I've always been COE. I just never really realized it till after I turned bulimic. I thought I ate a lot all the time. It's going to take me longer to get through those issues because I've had those longer. All in time.

<3

[heatherdawn1980]

Hey Jen--
I've created a diet/fitness/support community if you're interested in joining...

30_daychallenge Hope to see you there!

[starstruckjen]

Thanks for letting me know! Sounds like a great idea.

<3

[hopeyourashappy]

hi bday twin! im at the gym and i wanted to cry reading the beginning of ur post. i totally identify about not wanting to die without knowing someone has been completely head overheels in love with me. i often wnder if im actually capable of being really loved. i do know that it wont happen until i love myself. xx stay strong love.

[starstruckjen]

It didn't dawn on me till last night that I can't be loved the way I want/need to be if I don't feel the same about myself. I know that if I don't love myself, why am I going to believe a guy feels that way about me? It was an eye opening revelation for me. A must needed one at that too.

Hang in there hun. We will both be loved the way we need to be. We deserve it.

<3

[lucid_whisper]

Jen,

You and Stacey have the same icon but different colors and I keep getting confused - hehe!

I think it is awesome that you don't have any regrets and that you're content. :)

I wish it would rain here - it is so hot!

Too bad we don't live near each other, it would be cool to hang out!

~Krystal

[starstruckjen]

Krystal,

Yeah I realized that about Stacey's icon the other day. :)

It's been hot and humid here lately. The cool and rainy day was a treat. The rain was much needed too. The grass around here is turning brown.

I would absolutely love to hang out with you. Maybe one day down the road that could happen!

<3

[flowerlady2]

hey i saw your comments on a community i am in and wondered if you wanted to talk?

[starstruckjen]

sure, i'd love to talk. :)

[flowerlady2]

hmm .. do you have msn? lol

[starstruckjen]

no, i have aim. do you have that?