full-time asshole, professional flake.

you want this.

( so, i got a haircut )

today, was the best day of my life, hands down.
seriously.
best day, ever

and you know why?
because when i woke up i smelled snow.
come to me winter!!!

i nearly creamed my boxers.
(uh oh, did i really say that out loud?)

WATCH IFC
it'll make you smart!

this entry started out as a list of the qualties in people i don't like.
then i realized that i've narrowed the list down to the far and few between.
maybe i've become an asshole,
but i really just don't like any of you fuckers anymore.

and yes, this is probably your fault.
and no we can't be friends.

( Read more... )

( Read more... )

i miss Lucy
i want her to come visit me again.
Oh, Lucy where have you gone.
Minnesnowda is much too cold for your pretty face.
come back to Omaha.
please?
i made pancakes...

going back to california.
see the 'rents.
and good old Derby.
how much time do you get for poisioning your parents?

i bought her candy.
i brought her her favorite movie.
i apolgized.
i mean, honestly, what the fuck do you girls want?!

"and when i'm watching the news and my daughter walks in and she was to ask, why are all those people on the floor, sleeping, covered in red, i told her that they were looking for God but found religion instead."