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Last I spoke - 4 months ago
{Here we are again, the Anti-star. Here to once again make a periodic reflection. Saturnine and mercurial ( Read more... ) -
A Rising Swarm
From my past comes a presence I have long since buried, to bring earthquakes to my bones. And my head carries the weight of a rising swarm of dead words and severed thoughts. There is no one left who I can share this burden with, thus I will keep my silence but deafen the heavens with blasphemies and tirades, my spine cracking under the pressure. ( Read more... ) -
Writer's block
I finally broke through months of having writer's block, and now I can finally write pages and pages at a time like I could before. This may not seem as drastic to anyone reading this, but to me it's like having an amazing breakthrough during a stint in a rehab therapy session. That's all for now. Seizures are getting worse and worse; I most ( Read more... ) -
update zero-eight (stuff about my seizures also)
all right, so after over 9 years of neurological, psychiatric and psychological examination; test after test, copay after copay, MRIs, EEGs, bloodwork, brain examinations etc., all well-paid professionals with different opinions on what my real problem was. we start with signs of schizo typical until when i was 9 or so, it could be years over or ( Read more... ) -
cracking under the pressure
i'm beginning to scare myself. i feel like i'm losing my grasp on reality. all these broken pieces of my mind drifting further and further away, shattering one by one. i am fighting a war against myself. enemies without faces, time passing by unnoticed, forward and backward. no control. and all i hear is faint screaming. i don't understand yet what ( Read more... ) -
long long long time
i forgot all about my silly online journal but here it still stands, rotting away. is anyone even still reading this shit? -
to answer all of you
I moved from Bristow, near Manassas, to Virginia Beach, to Norfolk, to Louisa, VA, and finally landed in Richmond near VCU. I've been working as a shift supervisor at starbucks selling my soul to the devil corporations for sweet cash to support my habit of self-medication. In and out of hospitals for major surgeries on close family and friends, I' ( Read more... ) -
wow, more fun
i just checked the last entries i wrote. the second to last one i wrote was when i turned 19. i am now 20. i find that a little funny. why do i even have this thing? -
damn
it has been so long since i have written one word on this thing. if anyone still reads it, i'll start updating it again.
so, here i am, working all the time, car trouble, boring "real life" stuff that i'd rather not deal with. i miss my friends. where are you all, bastards!? -
Aging
So I turn 19 tomorrow...
I'm not sure how I feel about that. I can buy tobacco in Utah now though, bonus.
Hangover here I come, ready or not.