this is soo lame. im a worrier and because of that i ahve been sick for like two days. first i had the pains from my ulcer and now im just icky. im just so worried about max and sean. this is bad. ugghh. i hate been such a caring person sometimes. that and im all icky over my own issue.

im not unhappy and i probably should be considering how horrible i feel about him leaving. but im actually kinda excited to see what is going to happen next ( Read more... )

ok so it took forever to talk to him, but i kinda sorta did it. interesting way to look at it but i did ( Read more... )

i look back on my life and regret nothing ( Read more... )

so now im stuck with the decesion ( Read more... )

omg i don't know what to do about all of this. im totally head over heels sensibly in love with this boy. it is not even in the least bit irrtating. like its not fixation its LOVE. its scarry but im not upset. the only thing that gets me is i think he knows. ha ha. how bad is that. i can't mess up our friendship for love. its simple and sooo ( Read more... )

this past week i got home from spending a weekend on the coast with my mom sister brother miller and the kids. when i got hom it was like i walked into a brick wall. i don't know how to explain it. i believe in spirits but i don't know if its cuz i want him to be here or what. but i swear my father was here. i could feel him. i could pin point ( Read more... )

i quiet my job ( Read more... )

i finally broke. it happened last night. i wasn't able to keep it in any longer. i can't take all of my stuff being ruined. i can't take working my ass off and helpin everyone only to be slapped in the face. i can't take rude people treating me like shit and then being nice as hell when they want my help. i can't take feeding everyone only to be ( Read more... )

ok so i work today. it was interesting. slow passes, which im not use to but still interesting. i work twevle hour days four days a week then i get three days off. i got the lucky shift and get to start working with the four during the week and getting friday sat. sund. off. it is sooo nice, for now. until i get switched to knock shift or have to ( Read more... )